The Same Place (The Lamb and the Lion #2) - Gregory Ashe Page 0,25
set of his jaw, and settled on the lawn, the toys, the house with honey-colored light in the windows. Sometimes, when he was lost in his own thoughts, he would come up against a house like this, a husband, kids, things hoped for at the edges of consciousness and never fully put into words. He could smell Ammon’s faded aftershave and his sweat.
“What are you doing?” Ammon asked.
“I’m not sure I can tell you.”
Pressing the heels of his hands against his eyes, Ammon seemed to struggle to hold something back. “Ok.”
“Do you want to tell me why you think Hannah committed a murder?”
“Come on, Tean.” Ammon dropped his hands. He had blue eyes; tonight, they were shot through with red. “I’m working an active case. I’m not going to talk about it with you.”
“It involves someone I care about.”
“To some degree. That’s all I’m going to say.”
“Should I be worried?”
“Maybe. Have you noticed any changes in her behavior? Anything unusual?”
“Maybe. Who is she supposed to have killed?”
“Will you stop that? Jeez. Do you have any idea how you sound? Hanging out with that . . . with that asshole has made you just as much of a smart aleck. Why are you even with him? Please don’t tell me you’re dating.”
“That’s none of your business.”
“Ok, ok. I know.” Ammon held up both hands. Then he smiled, the old smile. “It’s really good to see you. I like hearing your voice, but it only makes me miss you more.”
The night breeze was colder now; goose bumps pebbled Tean’s skin.
Ammon’s hand, warm and solid, found his arm. His touch slid down until he caught Tean’s fingers. “I know you’re not happy with me—”
“Ammon, let’s not do this right now.”
“No, this is when we have to do it because you won’t agree to meet in person, you won’t answer the door when I come to the apartment, you won’t write back when I email. Did you even read my emails?”
Of course Tean had. Pages and pages of them. Over and over again. Until he was sick, physically sick, with how much he hurt. And then reading them some more. But he had drawn a line in the sand the year before, after yet another broken promise, and he couldn’t erase it now. He just pressed his lips together and looked past Ammon at the perfect house on the perfect street.
“I know you’re not happy with me,” Ammon said again, “but I want you to know that I care about you in a way I’ve never cared about anyone else.”
“I can’t,” Tean said, trying to work his hand free. “Please let go.”
“And I’m seeing a therapist. I’m figuring myself out.”
“And you’re married and have four kids. Please let go.”
“If I let go, will you let me finish?”
“No.”
Ammon tightened his grip, but he smiled a little. “Then I’m going to hold on a little bit longer. One of the things Chaz has helped me understand—”
“You’re seeing a therapist named Chaz?”
“—is how unfairly I’ve treated you. That really upsets me. I want to make things right. I want to treat you the way you deserve to be treated.”
“What about Lucy? How does your wife deserve to be treated?
Ammon’s blue eyes widened like the words had been a slap. His lips parted, but he just took a few labored breaths. Then he managed to say, “I moved out. You’re the most important person in my life; when you ended things, I realized I needed to show you that. So I moved out.”
For a moment, Tean was frozen. Then he said, “I can’t do this with you right now. I honestly can’t. What do you want me to say to that? Why are you telling me now?” He shivered, and he didn’t know if he was trying to pull away or not. “Let go, Ammon.”
Ammon released him, but before Tean could take a step, he said, “I’ll tell you about Hannah.”
Tean rubbed his hand. “Why?”
“I’ll tell you anything you want to know if it means you’ll talk to me for a few more minutes.”
“Don’t do that. Don’t make this about us. Jem and I are trying to help Hannah. You and I don’t have anything else to talk about.”
“She’s not in trouble,” Ammon said. “Not exactly.”
“So why have you been following her?”
“We’re looking for someone; this is a missing-person investigation. It seems like Hannah might know something. We got a tip that Hannah might go visit this person tonight; we’re waiting to see if she does.”