Salvation City - By Sigrid Nunez Page 0,38

unsaved. At his worst moments he is afraid that he accepted Jesus not out of faith but to please Pastor Wyatt. He is not a true believer. He became a Christian because he did not see how he could stay in Salvation City if he didn’t.

He fills the moat with crocodiles. He draws a little medieval child about to fall in. A guardian angel poised on a turret, ready to swoop down.

WHEN THE PLAGUE STRUCK Salvation City, Tracy had not been among those who were passed over. Like Cole, she’d had a brush with death. One morning, when they were supposed to be studying tectonic plates, she told him all about it.

“It was touch-and-go with me for about two weeks. The way I felt was worse than being sick with the cancer. What it was really like was chemo. I was weak and dizzy as a top and I kept throwing up. And I remember it was just like I was dreaming, even when I was awake. I knew I should be praying nonstop, but there were times when I was just too sick. And though I always put my trust in God, I tell you, I was scared. You know, it wasn’t as bad here as it was in some other places, but there were plenty of folks who didn’t make it through, and some of the ones that did make it have never been the same.

“I remember lying there in my sopping sheets and starting to panic because I was having so much trouble breathing. And this great shivering took ahold of me, really like some kind of fit, and I had room for only one big thought and it was that my time had come. I tried to call WyWy but all I got out was a squeak. It was daytime, but all of a sudden the room got way dark, like night. Next thing I felt myself being sucked through that darkness, like a train racing top speed through a tunnel. Then I burst out the other end into this flashing light, which I knew right off was a holy light. And standing right in the middle of that light I saw him.”

Holding up his hand like a traffic cop.

“Like, not so fast, ma’am!”

It was the second time Christ had appeared to her. The first time, she was in the hospital and had just had surgery.

“Only that time it was night and I was lying there wide awake. It’s not like the doctors were mean to me but they didn’t hide the bad news, either. I remember I turned my face to the wall and started crying harder than I’ve ever cried in my life. And then someone turned on the light. Or at least that’s what I thought at first. Then I rolled over and saw him.”

He was sitting in the visitor’s chair by the bed.

“That really got to me, how he was sitting there with his legs crossed like any ordinary dude, except for the awesome light. And even before he said a word, I stopped crying. My family always loved me, and from the time they knew I was sick they were right there, doing everything they could for me. But nothing they ever did brought me anything like the peace I felt then. It was just a whole ’nother scale. I still thought I was going to die, but now I was ready.”

Except what Jesus had come to tell her was a different story.

“You know me, CoCo, I got a memory like a sieve. But even though I didn’t write them down, I never forgot his words. ‘Your name is written in the book of life, and the day is near when you will be with me forever. But that time has not yet come. Do not be afraid of the suffering you will have to endure.’ He was talking about the pain and the horrible chemo and the fact that I’d never be able to have a baby.

“I was raised to believe in God, and I always went to church and said my prayers and tried to be a good person. But back then, I confess, whole days would go by without my giving much thought to Christ. But ever since then I have felt him right here, and I have always trusted him. That’s how I beat the cancer. I put my faith in his love, and in the end I got my reward. God sent me the best husband

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