hope surface and vanish in her expression as he did then. Gia seemed to have so many questions, and too many thoughts and they all landed in her mouth, coming out as insulting and stupid.
“I…can’t help that.”
If he wasn’t so wrapped up in her, Kai might have laughed or screamed or called her a bitch. When Gia cut, it was to the bone and he felt that sharp sting right then.
“No,” he finally said, not ready to walk away, not strong enough to stay. “I guess you can’t, ku'uipo, but it’s there. It’s behind all the smoke and mirrors you use to keep yourself from feeling any worthy damn thing. It’s there. One day you’ll find it.” He leaned down, pressing one soft kiss to her mouth. “I just pray I’m still around when you do.”
20.
GIA
LOVE DIDN’T CARE about your plans. It didn’t care that you had goals or standards or guidelines that you set for yourself. Love, Gia had been told by her mother, settled itself comfortably on you whenever it pleased. It comes without any fair warning. It comes when you aren’t ready, when you know in the deepest wells of your heart that there is nothing left to give anyone else. Then, faster than you can say, “no, not for me, thanks,” love elbows its way into those dark, vacant stores you swore could never be filled and languishes. It makes itself right at home.
At least, that was her mother’s theory.
Gia had refused to test it in twenty years. She’d come close, only twice, but had never figured there was room for love or enough of her heart left for the scavenger love would become when it decided to make its hasty exit.
This was a conversation she’d had at length with Cat, mostly when they drank, usually when Reese managed to join them before the Minnesota game and the full-on confession she made about loving Ryder. They were officially out as a couple. The world knew and Gia forgot to be annoyed about their confessions when they made them, figuring if she could sleep with Kai and enjoy it, then her placekicker and QB could have the torch they hadn’t managed to extinguished in over a decade and carry it to their hearts’ content.
But Cat? Of the three of them Gia would have never believed the woman capable of what she saw in her office one Thursday afternoon just before she and her assistant had decided to finish up their work and head to Lucy’s for dinner.
“It’s five for one,” Gia reminded Cat, laughing when the woman grinned. “And Ansel is working.” Her assistant’s smile widened as she helped Gia pack away the files of players she’d been researching for Ricks. “He’s sweet on you.”
“He’s sweet on anyone with an open tab,” Cat said, stacking the papers into their appropriate files, not looking at Gia as she spoke. “Fine as he is, Ansel is a little too pretty for me.”
“Is that even possible? I mean is there a man…” The tall figure standing in the doorway had Gia shutting up, her heart racing as she wondered if Kai had finally given up his two week freeze out and decided to see her. But as Gia looked around Cat, leaning down to reach for the laptop bag on the floor, she had to push back her disappointment when it wasn’t Kai she spotted. “Mr. Wilson,” she greeted, her attention immediately shifting to Cat when she glanced at Gia, eyes first wide then rolling at the man’s name. He’d made such a nuisance of himself the past season. Cat had rarely gone a day without getting flowers or candies at the office. Then, just two weeks ago, all that stopped. Gia thought that would have made her assistant happy and she was, for a bit, but now…now Cat seemed off.
“Miss J,” Wilson said, nodding to Gia, hand up, she guessed, in a small apology. “I don’t mean to mess up your day or interrupt…”
“We’re…just finishing up,” she told him, glancing at Cat when she continued to pick up the papers and files. “Is there something I can do for you?”
“Nah…I mean, no ma’am,” he corrected, stepping farther into the office. “I just got one thing…” When Cat went on ignoring him, keeping her back to Kenya, some of his calm seemed to leave him. “Cat…I just wanted to say…I’m sorry.”
She held a file in her hand that she’d been thumbing through, but stopped, straightening her shoulders, manila folder held