Sahm I Am - By Meredith Efken Page 0,21
of a group whose moderators are so unkind. I receive plenty of that sort of treatment off-line.
Please know I am praying for you.
Love,
Phyllis
* * *
From:
P. Lorimer
To:
“Green Eggs and Ham”
Subject:
I am sheepish
* * *
Please ignore my previous e-mail. After rereading Zelia’s post, I belatedly realized she was satirizing Rosalyn’s mannerisms. I feel very foolish. However, I tend to be overly serious and humor is difficult for me. Please be patient—I will try to be more on top of things.
Love,
Phyllis
* * *
From:
Zelia Muzuwa
To:
“Green Eggs and Ham”
Subject:
Thanks, guys
* * *
You all are great! Phyllis, I love you, even if you are humor-challenged. We’ll work on that, won’t we, girls?
Z
* * *
From:
P. Lorimer
To:
“Green Eggs and Ham”
Subject:
Thanks, and a Question
* * *
Thank you, all of you, for being so gracious to me. I felt really embarrassed.:) But my question is this—why do you stay on SAHM I Am? Regardless of Zelia’s purpose for the e-mail, Rosalyn was unaccountably rude. Why don’t you create a new group?
Phyllis
* * *
From:
Dulcie Huckleberry
To:
“Green Eggs and Ham”
Subject:
Re: Thanks, and a Question
* * *
I can answer that one, Phyllis. Why make a new group just because some people on the first group get on your nerves? If we had done that, we might not have met you or Brenna or any of the other really sweet women on our loop. But beyond that, you never can tell why a person behaves the way she does. In Rosalyn’s case, we figure something went terribly wrong in her childhood. That’s the only reason we can think of for someone to turn out that way. Just watch—there’s this weird undercurrent when she talks about her family. And someday, if Rosalyn’s “perfect little world” falls to pieces, she’s going to need us to love her, even with all her faults. So that’s why we stay.
Dulcie
* * *
From:
P. Lorimer
To:
“Green Eggs and Ham”
Subject:
Re: Thanks, and a Question
* * *
Wow. I stand corrected. You’d think as a pastor’s wife I’d know these things by heart. But I don’t think I’m a very good pastor’s wife, really. I’m just a normal person who has a lot to learn. Thanks, Dulcie.
Love,
Phyllis
* * *
From:
Zelia Muzuwa
To:
SAHM I Am
Subject:
[SAHM I Am] URGENT: need help removing cat tower from son's head
* * *
Griffith stuck his head inside our neighbor’s kitty scratching-post tower and I can’t get it off. Any advice? He’s outside with the neighbor, screaming and trying to walk. Just ran into a tree, I think—gotta go.
Z
* * *
From:
Dulcie Huckleberry
To:
Zelia Muzuwa
Subject:
Re: [SAHM I AM] URGENT: need help removing cat tower from son's head
* * *
Why on earth are you e-mailing us? Call an ambulance! Dulcie
* * *
From:
Rosalyn Ebberly
To:
SAHM I Am
Subject:
Re: [SAHM I AM] URGENT: need help removing cat tower from son's head
* * *
Don’t panic, Zelia. I know exactly what to do. First, remove the carpeting and any extra posts or platforms. Then simply take a wood clamp and insert the ends in the hole, on each side of his neck. Crank the clamp apart and it will crack the wood, allowing you to ease his head out. Watch for splinters. In fact, it would be a good idea to try to work a washcloth up inside the tower to protect his eyes. Can you open up one of the ends of the tower so you can reach his face?
Rosalyn
“She looks well to the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.”
Proverbs 31:27 (NASB)
* * *
From:
Brenna L.
To:
SAHM I Am
Subject:
Re: [SAHM I AM] URGENT: need help removing cat tower from son's head
* * *
Well, if he got his head in, he can wiggle it out. Offer some chocolate—that should motivate him.
Brenna
* * *
From:
The Millards
To:
SAHM I Am
Subject:
Re: [SAHM I AM] URGENT: need help removing cat tower from son's head
* * *
Try packing his head with ice. It’s supposed to relieve swelling, and it will numb him. Then if you pull wrong, it won’t hurt as bad.
Good luck!
Jocelyn
* * *
From:
Zelia Muzuwa
To:
SAHM I Am
Subject:
Re: [SAHM I AM] URGENT: need help removing cat tower from son's head
* * *
Well, ladies, MacGyver you are not. Griffith wouldn’t hold still for the clamps—which we had to borrow from the neighbor, since Tristan owns nothing more than a hammer and a screwdriver. And the poor thing can’t wiggle out—he keeps trying, but I’m afraid he will hurt himself. We did remove the carpet, but we can’t get the platforms and bars off without either pounding or using a saw—either of