Ryan's Love - C.A. Harms Page 0,21

actually sounds amazing and all, but…” She paused. “When he’s alone with you, what is he like?”

I couldn’t control the smile that took over my lips. “He’s so sweet, and he flirts in the smallest of ways, yet it fills my stomach with butterflies.”

Then I grew silent, remembering the things he shared. I gave her the quick version of Ryan’s past. When I was done, she stared back at me, a look of sadness in her eyes.

“Wow, that’s awful,” she said. Though awful wasn’t a good enough word to describe the loss he had suffered.

“He is so sweet, Bay,” I said, turning around to face her. “I know he wants to try. I can see that. And I’m willing to take my time getting to know him. I mean, really, any man who loves as fiercely as he does is worth waiting for.”

“Just don’t fall too fast,” she said. “I just want you to make sure he’s emotionally available. Loving so strongly only to have that person ripped away from you when you aren’t ready to let go is a hard thing to get over. Just be careful.”

I knew where she was coming from. Bailey’s brother took his own life two years ago after a bout of severe depression. The two of them were so close growing up, and she was devastated when he enlisted in the army after high school. When he came back from his first tour, he had changed from the outgoing and fun Gabe we knew to someone who was withdrawn and isolated. He hated crowded spaces and freaked out almost instantly without provocation when he was in them.

Those things should have been enough to let everyone around him know he was silently suffering, trapped in a world of terror within his mind. But Bailey thought he was just going through some problems readjusting after the horrors he’d witnessed. She thought he’d be able to get through it on his own. Instead, she was the one who found his body. Her entire family fell apart after that, and it was one of the saddest things I’d ever seen.

“I will, Bailey, I promise.” I pulled her in for a hug.

The same thoughts had crossed my mind during my time with Ryan yesterday. I wondered if he truly was ready to move forward or if he was only forcing himself to. But after just a short time with him, I knew I wanted to give it a shot. What would trying hurt?

Chapter Eleven

Ryan

Our date last night was good. I hadn’t felt that relaxed and carefree in such a long time. It was a fun evening of talking and laughing; no expectations, just two people getting to know each other.

But everything shifted the moment I entered the kitchen. Olivia sat at the snack bar with a bowl of cereal in front her that looked as if it hadn’t been touched. She was dressed for school and staring out the back window toward the lake behind our house. I could sense her bad mood.

“Morning, Liv,” I said as I poured myself a cup of coffee. “How’d you sleep?”

“Fine.” I could hear the attitude in her voice immediately.

“Talk to me,” I said as I leaned back against the counter. She didn’t even turn to face me, only offering me a slight shrug of her shoulder. “If you don’t tell me what’s wrong, I can’t help fix it.”

“You took her to the lake. I overheard Uncle Jackson when I was on the phone with Gran,” she replied in a clipped tone. “Mom loved that lake, and you took that girl there. I can’t believe you would do that. It was just wrong.”

I shook my head and let out a steadying breath. “Olivia, there isn’t a place in this town your momma didn’t love. Hell, honey, anyplace I would have gone would have been one your mother and I had been to at one point in time. There’s no way to avoid it.”

I had thought the talk we had last night would be explanation enough. I thought she understood how I was feeling and accepted my choice to move forward. I guess I was wrong.

“If you wanna be angry at me, then be angry,” I said. “I can’t bring her back. If I could, I would in a second. But she’s not coming back, and I know she would want us to be happy.”

“I was perfectly happy before you decided to replace my mother with some random woman.” Her nostrils flared as she