couldn’t live without him, as he bled him. He told Gav he was his one and only as he whipped his back.
Gav just looked at his doll. Even when he grew older. Even when everyone at school called him a nerd, and the most popular girl told him to watch it when he tripped into her.
Gav promised to ruin that girl’s life.
Then Gav’s father died in an accident. Gav was no longer tormented, but he cried that night. He cut himself to feel the blood his father used to extract out of him.
He cried when no one hit him and fucked him.
Gav masturbated with his doll, but he wasn’t satisfied anymore.
So Gav decided to find a replacement for his father. He married an abusive woman who spoke like his father did and raped him in the same way.
Gav got his father back. He got his balance back.
And every night, when his wife was asleep, Gav stared at that doll. He’d smile and tell her, “Your master is here, so you can sleep, Doll.”
She didn’t listen to him sometimes, so he placed her between his legs and punished her.
Gav had a daughter, but she wasn’t a doll. She was just an extension of him. He didn’t love her like he loved his doll.
His daughter was a reminder of his cruel wife, too. She looked so much like her, and every time he saw her, he wanted to push her away so that his wife would only beat him.
Gav knew he had to act normal. He was good at acting normal. No one suspected him — not even in his father’s mansion. His wife didn’t suspect him either.
Gav was a good boy.
He raised his daughter to be a good girl. He knew when to cry and how. Gav practised smiles and tears every day. He practised people, too.
He watched them and knew how to get to them — how to make them like him. The more people liked him in parties, the harder his wife raped him. So Gav made himself more likeable until his wife nearly killed him with her beatings.
Gav smiled when he fell asleep hugging his doll.
Then Gav’s wife found the doll. She made fun of it and of him. She told him he was a psycho and threw the doll into the fireplace. Gav screamed as the smell of burnt plastic filled the air.
His wife killed his doll.
Gav didn’t know how it happened. One second, his wife was laughing as she left. And the next, Gav ran behind her and pushed her.
She fell and then she no longer breathed.
Something inside Gav unlocked. His father was dead. His wife was dead. No one understood him or his needs.
The night his wife died, Gav cried because he couldn’t smile anymore.
He’d lost his doll.
But then he found her. He’d seen her before, but he had his doll at the time, so he didn’t care much about any other doll.
But that night was different. That night, she was crying. His doll didn’t cry, she only smiled.
Now, she cried for him. She was sad for him, and Gav decided he’d found his doll again.
Gav knew that he’d own that doll.
He didn’t want to hurt her, though. He didn’t want to unleash how much he missed her.
So he found other dolls, temporary ones. He hit them from the back, masturbated to their helpless bodies, then left them in the forest.
They had golden blonde hair and bright blue eyes. They looked like his doll, but weren’t.
Now, Gav has his doll. She comes to him. She smiles at him and compliments him.
He cooks for her, washes her, and brushes her hair. He changes her clothes and takes pictures of her. When no one is looking, he masturbates to them.
To her.
His doll.
The one he’ll own forever.
No one believed in his happily ever after, but he did.
He believed that he and his doll would have forever. One way or another.
My hands are unsteady as I find the pictures in the box. Countless pictures of Silver in several indecent positions — while she’s asleep, half-naked, through the shower peephole.
The door to the office opens and I glance up.
Sebastian stares at me. “What are you doing here?”
“Do you have a gun?” I ask in a voice I don’t recognise.
He nods.
I never saw it coming when I should’ve.
That’s what happens when you watch everyone else except for yourself. When you observe everything except for the thing that’s right in front of your eyes.