Ruthless (Black Mountain Academy) - Mila Crawford Page 0,52

Black’s daughter; you never were, not for a single instant.”

She held me silently for a while as I came back down from the sick twisting in my stomach. She helped me up off the floor, guiding me back to my bed, before fetching a damp washcloth to wipe my forehead. “You should tell Kyler.”

“What can I say? He won’t want to hear any of it.”

“You tell him that what happened to him is not his fault any more than what happened to you.”

“Or you.” I gulped.

“Exactly, honey. You might be surprised by how much he wants to hear it. You were both a product of your circumstances; it’s what you make of them that counts.”

I nodded, suddenly feeling the tension ease away a little. “I think I’m going to go find him.”

“Good, that’s good.” She smiled softly as we walked down the hallway together.

“I just hope he doesn't slam the door in my face.” I sniffed when I reached the door. “Thanks, Mom.”

“Always, honey.”

I turned and darted across the path to Kyler’s. When I reached his door, I knocked, then glanced down at my feet, shaking my head when I realized I’d been in such a rush to get to him I’d practically run over here in my fuzzy house slippers.

“What?” Kyler swung the door wide, saw it was me, and made to slam it again. I stopped him just in the nick of time by wedging my foot in the door, the heavy wood like a vise against my cheap slippers and the door jamb.

“Ow! Dammit, Kyler Sinclair!”

Chapter 31

“He's more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.” ― Emily Brontë, Wuthering Heights

Kyler

There was a nasty looking gash on her foot, with blood pooling out of it in the exact spot that I selfishly allowed the bottom of the door to scrape along her delicate skin. When I saw that cut, I felt my heart sink. I never cared about the kinds of harm I inflicted on people. In reality, that scrape was her own fault. But with Maddy, I never wanted her to feel anything but happiness.

“Jesus, Maddy. I’m so sorry.”

“What’s wrong with you? Can’t you just be normal and not let your emotions control every damn thing you do?”

Her question took me off guard. I tried so hard not to feel, and here she was accusing me of being controlled by emotions. The truth was, she was right. I couldn’t ignore it anymore. Maddy was the key, she came blazing into my life and unwrapped everything, leaving all the debris flying in her wake.

“Are you going to come in or am I to pick you up and throw you over my shoulder?” I opened the door wide, giving her space, avoiding touching her as much as possible. Her eyes burned through me as she walked by, making sure to intentionally bump me. It was infuriating how damn beautiful she was, even all pissed off at me.

“That’s your first aid kit?” she said, looking at the zip lock baggie I pulled out of the cupboard above the sink.

“It gets the job done.” I shrugged, taking her foot in my hand. “You really think these shoes were the most practical to wear?” I pulled the ridiculous slipper off her foot and stared at the violent looking gash.

“They were the first things I saw.”

“I guess it could be worse, you could be wearing one of those nail-heeled type contraptions that Tamlin and the other girls like to wear. But shoes really should be more practical.”

“I thought men liked stiletto heels,” she said, her eyes pinning me with their beauty. I couldn’t help thinking just how breathtaking she was.

“You’re really beautiful, you know?” I said, dabbing a cotton ball on her foot.

“Ouch,” she hissed, trying to bat my hand away. “That really hurt.”

“It’s supposed to, it’s rubbing alcohol.”

“Well, do you need to use so much of it?” She winced. “I knew you hated me but not this much.”

I knew she was joking, but her words made my broken heart ache.

“I don’t hate you, Maddy, the opposite actually.” The words came rushing out of me as if on autopilot. That was the thing about Maddy, she made me feel and say things that were completely against my nature. I wasn’t sure if she had set me free or imprisoned me.

I never believed in love. Love was just an illusion, a facade, a dream. Whatever it was, it wasn’t rooted in reality. Humans were selfish