The Rush (The Siren Series) - By Rachel Higginson Page 0,64
too and was furious I gave it away.
Honor tightened her arms around me once more and then released me. I watched her walk away and step into my mother’s cold arms and shivered. I glanced up at Smith who was watching Honor with a barely restrained flight instinct. Anyone could see his desire to grab his daughter and get as far away from her biological mother as humanly possible. I wondered if maybe it was the chemo drugs that flipped the switch in his male brain. Is that what happened to Ryder too? Especially after our conversation last night, I was convinced my curse held no power over Ryder. But then why not? Was he sick as a kid or something? Maybe a drug addict in years past, and the drugs had done a number on his brain?
Except he was way too perceptive for his own good. It definitely wasn’t an intelligence thing.
Grrr. I hated how much he consumed my thoughts, how invasive just thinking about him felt. He was this absolute enigma in my life and I had no idea what to do with him.
I wasn’t even sure I wanted to do anything with him.
I glanced up at Smith, wondering if there was a way to ask him about his time in the hospital. Maybe he had some insight that would be useful. He turned to face me when he felt my eyes on him and held my gaze. He tilted his head toward the hallway in a gesture asking if I would go with him. I nodded just barely in response, shocked that he was willing to leave Honor alone with my mom.
“Ava, I’m going to show Ivy a book I’ve been reading about depression. I think it will really help her,” Smith declared in his rich voice that usually commanded board rooms and was right now bending the force of nature that was my mother to his will.
“Why, Smith?” my mother asked coyly. “Are you struggling with depression? I’m sure my lawyer would love to hear the details.”
“Not at all,” Smith replied with a firm hint of irritation lacing every word. “This is for Ivy. It has nothing to do with me.”
“Fine,” my mother sighed as if it was the greatest inconvenience ever. Although her pretend irritation was all a lie, I could see the greed light her dead eyes, her fingers practically shaking with the opportunity to manipulate and brainwash Honor.
I followed Smith out of the room, across his open foyer and down a short hallway. He opened the door to his study and let me pass before looking surreptitiously into the hallway as if on look out. When he was satisfied we weren’t followed, he closed the door quietly and walked over to perch his hip on his massive mahogany desk.
“We don’t have much time. I don’t trust your mother alone with Honor for more than a few minutes,” Smith explained quietly.
“I feel the same way,” I lowered my voice as if my mother had super hearing or something.
“First, tell me, are you Ok?” Smith’s steely expression met mine. He was truly concerned. For me.
The realization took my breath away. Nobody was really concerned about me. Everyone, even kids from school, assumed my “rehab” was an excuse to escape the aftermath of Sam’s accident. But now Smith and Ryder in less than twenty-four hours. I felt the ground shift beneath my feet, or maybe it was less physical… maybe it was more like a shifting inside of me, like my soul opened a little bit to the outside world.
“I’m Ok,” I answered truthfully. Both in his question and my answer the subtle hints of what “Ok” meant were obvious to both of us. Ok for me was all very relative. I was Ok because I was alive and not currently being physically abused. I was Ok because I was back home near Honor and able to keep a close eye on my mother. I was Ok. But at the same time I was so far from being Ok it was sickening.
“Good,” Smith grunted gruffly. He paused for another moment, stealing a glance at the door. “Ivy, if you ever need anything, I mean anything, money, a place to stay, a plane ticket, anything, you let me know. Alright?”
“Alright,” I nodded my head for extra emphasis. It was nice to know Smith wanted to help; it was even nicer to know Smith understood that I needed help. But, I couldn’t under any circumstance take him up