Rule of Wolves (King of Scars #2) - Leigh Bardugo Page 0,159
talk about ships and how Opjer had built his empire and where he’d been on his travels. But every minute he spent in his father’s presence put them both at risk.
“Forgive me for a certain mercenary bent, but is there anything more you can tell me of Fjerda’s plans?”
Opjer smiled. He looked almost proud. “I can tell you Jarl Brum hopes to marry his daughter to Prince Rasmus.”
“Our intelligence suggests Rasmus might favor diplomacy over open war.”
“He might. But once he’s a member of Brum’s household, I would count on nothing. If Brum can’t control the prince, he’ll find a way to destroy him. There is a quality among Fjerdans … we call it gerkenig. The need for action. We leap in when we shouldn’t because we can’t help ourselves. If Brum sees an opportunity, he’ll take it. I’ve been guilty of it many times myself.”
“Recklessness.”
“Not exactly. It’s a need to seize the moment.”
“That sounds uncomfortably familiar.”
“I thought it might.”
In the distance, from the direction of the laboratories beneath the Gilded Bog, they heard a series of booms.
“Fireworks,” said Nikolai.
“Of course,” said Opjer, and Nikolai knew he didn’t believe a word of it. “I suppose this is where we say goodbye.”
“I’m not sure we’ve even properly said hello. I am…” Nikolai struggled to find a word for what he felt. Sorry to see this stranger go? Longing for a father he’d never had? Grateful that Opjer was willing to give up the life he knew for the sake of preserving Nikolai’s false bloodline?
The man Nikolai had believed to be his father for most of his life had been a source of embarrassment and shame. Nikolai had never understood him, never wanted to be like him. He’d read enough books and seen enough plays to understand what a father was meant to be—someone kind and steady who dispensed wisdom and taught you how to wield a sword and throw a punch. Actually, in most plays, the fathers got killed off and had to be avenged, but they certainly seemed wise and loving in the first act. Nikolai remembered what Zoya had said about her mother on the airship: Maybe I miss something I never had. Nikolai had never missed having a father because he’d never really had one. That was what he’d believed until this moment, standing at the gates, looking at Magnus Opjer.
“Here,” said Nikolai. “Your miniature.” He held out the portrait of his mother.
“Keep it. I don’t want to look backward. There’s too much regret there.” Opjer bowed. “Good luck, Your Highness.”
Nikolai watched his father go. He had to wonder at the mad ambition that had brought him here, that had driven him to pursue the crown when he might have had a hundred other lives. He might have left the future of Ravka to his brother. He might have gotten to be someone’s son. He could have loved whom he wanted to, married whom he wished to—assuming the vexing creature said yes. But all those lives were gone, vanished at each crossroads, with each choice he’d made. He’d given them up for Ravka. Would it be worth it in the end?
He didn’t know. But he wasn’t going to stand by a gate and brood over it.
“Zoya,” he called, as he jogged back to her and the guards. “Have you ever heard of something called gerkenig?”
“I believe it’s a stew,” said Count Kirigin. “Made with halibut?”
“It’s not a stew,” said Nikolai. “At least, not that I know of. But it’s given me an idea.”
Zoya tucked a strand of black hair behind her ear. “Is it a formula for quadrupling the amount of titanium we have?”
“Afraid not. This is a formula for blood.”
“Our blood or the Fjerdans’?”
“Saving ours, spilling theirs.”
It would mean sending Zoya away again. It would mean taking a tremendous gamble. Arkesk or the permafrost? If the Fjerdans couldn’t decide where to strike, maybe he could make the decision for them.
Nikolai began the long walk back to the laboratory. Dawn was coming and he had a mission to prepare for. He would write a letter for Zoya too, ask her to take care of Linnea Opjer if he didn’t survive, tell her all the things he hadn’t said on that damned airship and that he wasn’t fool enough to turn around and say now. He didn’t pause and his steps didn’t falter.
He would not look backward either.
35
NINA
YLVA FOUND THEM IN NINA’S BED, gowns half on, a rumple of silk and mouths bruised from kissing.