Royal Line (Tattered Royals #1) - Carrie Ann Ryan Page 0,59

it was what was needed. “That can’t happen again.” I felt like I was shredding my heart. Last night was one thing, but nothing said get your house in order like a fucking broken condom.

“Excuse me?” she asked, taking a step back. “What the hell?”

“I’m just saying, this was a wakeup call. I’m your bodyguard, not someone you should be fucking.”

“Fucking. So that’s it?”

“That was always what it was going to be, princess.”

“I hate when you call me that. You use it as an endearment once and then a slap in the face the next time. Make up your fucking mind.”

“Look at you with the potty mouth. Is that what happens when you fuck the help?” If I made her angry enough, she’d stay away. She’d see how bad I was for her.

“You’re lucky I don’t slap you right now.”

“Maybe you should just do it and get it over with,” I dared her. I sat my coffee down before I spilled it or broke the fucking mug. “You and me? Last night I—” I needed to get this right. “I thought we could keep this contained here. That I could give you what you needed for a moment in time. But this morning, that was one hell of a wakeup call. You’re not some random woman. You’re a princess. It will be bad for you.”

“Fine.” She squared her shoulders. “But you know what? I’ve had just about enough of men making decisions for me. You’re scared. Say that. Don’t give me some bullshit about not being right for me. About us never working...”

“I’m not scared of anything,” I lied.

“And you are an idiot if you believe that.”

“Maybe I am, but it doesn’t matter. You’re not for me just like I’m not for you. You’re a fucking princess, or did you forget that? Guys like me don’t end up with the happily ever after. That’s not how this goes.”

“How can I forget it? Everyone reminds me every second that they possibly can. And when I look in the mirror, I see the tiara even if it’s not on my head. I had to leave my country because of the title I have. Because of rules that I had no part of, rules I didn’t even realize existed that want to change my purpose and put me on a path that I didn’t ask for. I know I’m a princess, Kannon.”

“And I’m not your fucking prince. You belong with your family, and we’ll get you back there. I’m just the farm boy, and nothing is as you wish.”

I let out a curse as she pushed past me, the look in her gaze pure hatred. She shoved her shoulder into my side and kept going, but I could see the tears that were beginning to fall.

I had done that. I had hurt her. And I deserved whatever came next.

I let out a couple of breaths, knowing I just needed to calm down. But I couldn’t. Not when I had fucking hurt her. I knew I couldn’t be with her. It wasn’t smart for either of us. But what I could do was not hurt her anymore.

I didn’t have to push her away because she was going leave anyway. I didn’t have to hurt her to accomplish that.

She’d realize who I was, and then she’d walk away. I had simply done it first.

“Fuck,” I whispered.

I pushed out of the room and looked around the house. My team was gone. They must be switching out patrols, and I was fine with that.

But where the hell had London gone?

Something was wrong, I thought, the hairs on the back of my neck tingling. I frowned, went out the door, and everything inside me went on alert. There was a large pool of blood around the poolside cabanas, and neither London nor Sparrow was anywhere to be found.

Someone had fucking taken them.

And it was all my fucking fault.

Chapter 16

London

The ones you never saw coming hurt the most.

I awoke to what felt like a mouth full of cotton. My head throbbed and my muscles ached. I tried to blink, but my eyelids were far too heavy. When I tried to raise my hands to rub them, the skin on my wrists felt abraded.

What the hell?

And then in startling clarity, it all came back in a panorama of images just like in a movie. I’d been angry with Kannon. Angry that he’d pushed me away. Angry that he hadn’t wanted me. And then I’d gone running from the house. It