RoomHate - Penelope Ward Page 0,67
he looked me up and down. “Wow. Look at you. I definitely picked the right costume.”
“Not very scary. More sexy.”
“Well, you’re scaring me stiff.” He wriggled his brows before taking Bea from me and kissing her on the cheek. “You are officially a bumblebee now, Bumblebee.” Carrying her over to the window, he said. “Look at the lights, Bea. I put them up for you.” He’d gone off with her, his voice no longer audible as he whispered in her ear while showing her the decorations. He took her outside to look at the carved pumpkins.
I just stood back and watched them, wondering when exactly we’d become a little family. Was there an exact moment when we had crossed over? As much as I wanted to deny it as a self-protective mechanism, the past four months with Justin had felt more like a family experience than anything else in my entire life ever had. Scary or not, it had happened—both of us unable to admit it to each other. It had just evolved naturally without discussion. But while Bea was my entire life for at least the next eighteen years, was Justin only temporarily playing house? That remained to be seen.
Justin walked over and handed her to me. “I’m gonna go change. Be right back.”
The first group of trick or treaters arrived before Justin returned. Carrying Bea in one arm, I grabbed the large bowl and headed to the door to give out the candy.
As I was waving them off, I felt the warmth of his body behind me.
“I’m back.”
When I turned around, the sight of him nearly knocked the wind out of me. Justin was dressed in all black. He was supposed to be a SWAT team officer. A short sleeve black shirt displayed his muscular arms. A black vest with the words SWAT in white covered the shirt. He was wearing sleek black pants and heavy combat boots. It was one of the hottest things I’d ever seen.
“Oh my…” My body was burning up beneath my tight spandex getup.
“You like it?”
“Yeah…I love it.”
“They didn’t have a ton of costumes left in my size. It was either this or a clown. I didn’t want to scare Bea.”
“This was…yeah…a very good call.”
“I’m glad you think so,” he whispered close to my neck.
We only got a few trick or treaters, but it was still exciting anytime anyone knocked on the door. I was grateful that Roger was out in Irvine visiting his daughter, so that I didn’t have to deal with any potential awkwardness between him and Justin. If Roger were home, he might have stopped in to say hello. We hadn’t gone out again since the jazz festival. Things between Justin and me had evolved a bit since then.
It was almost time to call lights out. Cheri from next door had stopped in to see Bea in her costume. As I lingered at the door after saying goodbye to her, I looked over at Justin and Bea in the kitchen. As I watched him rocking her to sleep, a realization hit me. Whether I avoided a sexual relationship with him or not, my heart was already invested. In my mind, he belonged to me. So avoiding him physically out of fear just meant that I was missing out on something I desperately needed and wanted. Whether we had sex or not, if he left, I’d be just as devastated. Looking over at him in that sexy as hell SWAT uniform, I just knew I couldn’t let fear prevent me from experiencing it any longer.
I walked over to the both of them and kissed Bea’s head softly. When I looked up at him, he was already looking down at me with an intensity that almost seemed as if he knew exactly what I’d been thinking just seconds earlier. He cupped my entire face in his hand and pulled me firmly into his lips. It was the first time we’d kissed since the moment right before my date with Roger. This kiss was different than that one; it was tender.
My whole body felt limp as he spoke gruffly over my lips, “Why don’t you put her to bed.”
I simply nodded. My legs felt wobbly as I walked up the stairs. In my room, I carefully removed Bea from her costume so as not to wake her and placed her in the crib.
As I took off my Catwoman leotard, I stared over at the Adam and Eve bag taunting me on the bureau.
Should