Roderick's Purpose - Ellie St. Clair Page 0,32
is not knowing how to feel,” she said in a whisper. “He was a bastard, true, but he was the bastard I knew. I never really told him how much I did actually appreciate the fact he took me in and gave me a home, despite all the troubles we had. I don’t like how we ended things, with him unsure of how I felt. Does that make sense?”
Roderick took her hand in his, gazing at her long, elegant fingers that he knew were a thief’s asset.
“As you have pointed out, I don’t know much,” he said with a bit of a laugh. “But I do know that the man loved you, as much as he could love anyone. Why, he left his own flesh and blood behind and yet never wavered from his connection to you once you met.” He cleared his throat as she gripped his hand tightly as if drawing strength from him and his words. “I also know, more than anything, that he was proud of you. I didn’t know him well, ’tis true, and I canna say I was his most fervent admirer, but whatever he did, he still raised you to be a lass any would be proud to call a friend.”
He sensed her draw closer to him, felt her other hand, cool on his cheek.
“Thank you,” she whispered and brought her soft lips to his.
Chapter 12
Gwen didn’t know what had caused her to do it, nor why she couldn’t keep herself away from this man. She had felt the physical attraction to him from the moment she had, quite literally, collided with him, but never had she thought she could feel such an emotional attachment. Yet, his words stirred something within her, had been powerful enough to move her to feel such gratefulness to him, that she couldn’t hold herself back as she had wanted to pull more from him.
When she first kissed him, he drew back in apparent surprise, and yet it didn’t take long for him to respond, his lips moving over hers, but not with the same wild abandon that had fueled their previous kisses. No, this one lacked the fiery passion, and yet, somehow, was so much more than the others had been.
This kiss connected them in a new, different way. Their lips met tenderly at first, softly tasting, exploring, learning more of one another. His hands came round her back, drawing her softly, gently toward him, and within moments she found herself sitting in his lap, feeding off his warm strength as it wrapped around her. He enveloped her within the strong muscles of his arm, the hard planes of his chest, and his musky, masculine scent filled her, a mix of bergamot and, in some inexplicable way, the woodland, though they had spent the last two weeks confined to ship and train.
What was more apparent than anything, however, was the way he made her feel. Never before had she given herself over so entirely to someone else, to a man who made her feel like a woman. At this moment, she didn’t have the need to be the strong, resilient, emotionless Gwen who effortlessly cracked a safe without showing an ounce of fear. Instead, she let the raw, confused emotions flow through her and into him, and she was ever so grateful he allowed her to simply be.
They finally broke the kiss, and he rested his forehead against hers as their breath mingled in quick gasps. He brought his thumbs to her face, wiping away the tears that continued to drip down her cheeks.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, yet found she was unable to stop the flow once it had started.
“Not at all,” he responded, letting his fingers fall through the long, unbound tresses down her back. “It’s good to let go. You have to let yourself feel, sometimes, Gwen, or you’ll harbor that emotion inside until it destroys you.”
She nodded and wrapped her arms around his neck, snuggling her face into his shoulder. He was so solid, so… safe. It was a place she had never been before, where she found that she could actually trust someone besides herself, to watch over her and keep her from harm. Odd, she thought with a little laugh. The one person she found she was now able to rely on was the same person who had captured her and kept her under lock and key. And yet, now that they were no longer bound to one another by law, it