I frowned. “I don’t understand. It’s just the pre-season game, right? Do these things even really count?”
“Not for the team’s record, and not really to the veteran players, but for Makoa…” Zach clucked his tongue. “He signed as a free agent. These pre-season games are kind of like his Super Bowl. They’re his only chance to secure his spot on the team.”
“What do you mean?” I asked, gesturing toward the TV. “He’s already on the team.”
“No, remember what I told you last week?” Gemma asked. “They’re going to cut a bunch of guys before the regular season kicks off. They only keep a certain number for each position — first, second, third, maybe fourth string.” She shook her head, eyes finding the screen again. “If Makoa doesn’t impress the coaches…”
“Then, he’s out,” Zach finished for her.
My stomach sank, and as the Bears offense jogged out onto the field after the kick-thing, I noticed that Makoa wasn’t with them this round. The screen cut to commercial, and I stood, throwing my hands up.
“Wait, so they’re just not going to play him anymore? That’s bullshit. It was one mistake!”
“One mistake that cost them a turnover and a touchdown,” Zach pointed out.
I frowned. “Whatever. They should put him back in.”
“They might later, but… they could also sit him for the rest of the game, if coach thinks he’s off.” Gemma touched my arm. “It’s okay, he’ll—”
“This is all my fault,” I murmured, shaking my head. “I haven’t talked to him all week, and he’s probably all up in his head thinking he’s lost me, and that I hate him, and he probably can’t sleep or eat just like I can’t and…”
“Has he lost you?” Zach asked.
I rolled my lips together, still shaking my head as my gaze fell to the ribbon in my fingers. “I don’t think he ever could.”
Gemma and Zach gave each other a knowing look, and Gemma stood to stand beside me. “I knew you’d pull your head out of your ass.”
But I couldn’t congratulate her on her rightness, because I was too busy fuming at the stupid coach for pulling Makoa out of the game. “I need to get to New York.”
“What? Why?” Gemma asked, but I was already across her condo and pulling my shoes on.
“I need to get to this game and tell him I love him so he can play and not fuck this up.”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Gemma said, pulling me to a stop once my other shoe was on. “First of all, this game is in New Jersey. Secondly, there’s no train or bus or plane that can get you there before this game is over.”
I swallowed, standing in her grasp for a minute before I reached for my phone. “Fine. I’ll just call him.”
“Babe,” Gemma said, putting her hand over my phone before I could unlock it. “His phone is put away in his locker. He’s not going to look at it until this game is over.”
My shoulders deflated. “But… I have to get to him. I have to talk to him. I have to turn this around.”
“He’s going to be okay,” Zach assured me. “Even if this isn’t his best game, there are still two more to go.”
“Exactly. There’s nothing to be done right now, okay?” Gemma agreed, but then she smiled, squeezing my hand. “But if you want to go over what you’ll say to him when he gets back… well…” She glanced at Zach, who smiled at me, too, when Gemma turned back to me. “We’re all ears.”
My eyes flicked to the screen, heart squeezing at the fact that I couldn’t do anything to help Makoa.
“I don’t know where to even start,” I confessed. “How do I make this right?”
They shared another look — and I was beginning to think those two had their own secret language that never had to be spoken, just like Gemma and I had.
Then, Zach sat back down on the couch, patting the spot next to him. “I think it’s time the three of us made a game plan of our own.”
Makoa
It was late by the time the team bus pulled up to Halas Hall after our loss to the Giants.
We’d all shuffled out of the stadium in New Jersey with our heads down, and every step of the way home, we’d been silent — from the bus ride to the airport, the flight, and then the bus ride back to our own training facility.
I’d tried to sleep, but found myself unable to, and spent most