rug, and thrown it in the dumpster so I don’t have to look at one more reminder of the events that took place over three hours ago. She hasn’t stopped rubbing my back and the knowledge that once again my friends have had to come to my rescue doesn’t escape me. This all feels too familiar and I don’t think I can handle it.
“Well, score one for Matt, he has really good taste.”
The ring is stunning. A round Tiffany setting with at least a three carat diamond resting between six prongs. He must have forgotten how small I am. On my tiny fingers this ring looks twice its actual size.
“And Damian just left?” Mia pushes her glasses further up her nose, her face scrunched up in disapproval.
I nod, my eyes tearing up again. “His feet were pounding down the stairs. He left me.”
“Let’s not be so overdramatic, Addison. He left the situation, big difference.”
Not the way I see it. Leaving me alone with Matt, a diamond ring on my finger and having no idea what or who I was fending off was the equivalent of saying goodbye. There’s no denying I played a huge role in what happened tonight. I let Matt in—but I can’t help the resentment, the anger I feel that Damian abandoned me when I really needed him. Saying no to Matt was the easy part, physically making him leave, getting him to believe I no longer loved him was near to impossible.
“Part of me wishes I had let him beat the shit out of Matt, then at least he’d still be here with me. The wondering as to where he went or when he’ll be back is killing me.”
“He’s probably with Reed,” Paige says.
I’m sure she’s right. But it still stings. We were supposed to spend this week together in Malibu, and now I have no idea when I’m going to see him again.
“Addison, this will blow over.” Mia hands me another tissue. “I promise. Once you get a chance to explain things to Damian, he’ll understand, he’ll get it.”
“Of course he will. It may take a few weeks, but he’ll come around.”
I appreciate their positive words, but I have serious doubts.
My eyes are swollen, and I have a raging headache. I love that my friends dropped everything to be with me tonight, but if I haven’t learned anything over the past five years, it’s that I need to work this out on my own, be strong and pick myself back up.
“Thanks for coming over guys, but I think I’m going to go to bed.”
“You’re kicking us out?” Mia asks affronted.
“No, you’re welcome to stay, but I need to go lie down alone with my tormented thoughts.”
They both give me worried smiles. “Guys, I’m sad, devastated really, but I’m not the same person I was when Matt left. I can’t let myself go back to being that person.”
Looking at each other, for affirmation that it’s okay to leave I make it even easier for them. “Fine, I am kicking your ass’s out. So, don’t feel guilty. I’m not going to run off and do something stupid.”
“Why the hell not? That’s exactly what you should do, something crazy and stupid and bring me with you!”
“Maybe next week, but tonight, I need to lie down and feel this pain. Feel how shitty today was, so that tomorrow . . . tomorrow I can wake up and remember, it’s a new day and I have a lot of life to look forward to.”
“First, Addison, that was way too sappy and you need to knock that shit off, second, by next week, this will all be fixed.”
As they’re walking towards my door Paige turns, “You know Addy, three years ago you would have taken that ring and moved to New York, no questions asked. I’m proud of you for kicking his ass to the curb, even after Damian took off.”
The minute the door closes, I wish I’d asked them to stay. My apartment is too big, too quiet and holds too many memories. That damn red pillow sits smack in the middle of my sofa, a heart-breaking reminder that I don’t know if I’ll ever get him back. How is it possible that in the span of five years I’ve lost two great loves? If it’s true that a person only experiences one great love in a lifetime, then I’m royally screwed.
Fuck, I’m heartbroken—again.
Taking off all my clothes, I crawl onto my bed and let the cool crisp feeling of