Revealing the Monster (Playing with Monsters #4) - Amelia Hutchins Page 0,152

back everything you had lost.”

I held his face between my palms, smiling at him. “Thank you, Lucian. You’re a good man, even though you’re not really a man at all.”

“I am a monster,” he confirmed.

“Yeah, but you’re my monster. I’m not concerned about what you are or that some great force created you to house the evil beings threatening gods and humans. I only care that you’re mine and that I love you.”

He leaned closer to me, brushing my lips in a feather-soft kiss that sent a shiver rushing through me. I hadn’t noticed how the furies inside me had numbed my emotions and senses. In this form, I could smell the heady scent of masculinity that clung to him better. I could see every speck of impurities and perfection in his gaze.

Lucian had eyes that sparkled with actual galaxies in their depths. I saw the souls within them as well. He was unguarded, and yet he never completely allowed his shields to drop. I’d learn to accept that he wasn’t human, and he’d never be fully able to lower his defenses.

“I wanted to tell you so many times about Benjamin, Magdalena. Every time I came here, I imagined what it would be like when you learned he lived. Your family, if I’d said anything to you about them the others would have known what I intended to do, they’d have ruined my plans before they had begun. What I did for you is not allowed. You cannot bring back the dead, and I intended to do so.”

“I wasn’t dead, though, not really.”

“You were. You were simply a body that the furies were consuming. When you slumbered, I fed you parts of the souls I’d captured to keep the furies from completely devouring what was left of your soul. That was why I trapped you in our bedroom at the club. The thought of you being away from me and them eating your soul and leaving your corpse—it would have been the end. The furies cannot remain inside someone without a soul to consume. Once they had finished feeding on you, they would have moved on to another soul. Hades and Nyx, they didn’t realize how much the three furies would devour.”

“I was dying?” I swallowed past the lump that formed in my throat. “They were killing me to escape the hold I held on them?”

“From the moment of your rebirth, yes. Luckily, you were resurrected with a large portion of your soul, or larger than you’ve held since. You’re missing the portion they consumed. It isn’t something I can get back.”

“And we don’t know what part it was, either. Do we?” I questioned carefully.

His dark head shook as my hands dropped into my lap. So, I was missing parts of myself. Was I upset about it? No. Because losing it didn’t change how I felt about Lucian or our son. To me, those were the things that mattered most.

“Are you going to miss it?” I asked as he stepped back to start the bathwater.

“No, but you will. Souls are important, and without knowing what it was you lost, I can’t foresee what will transpire. I should have acted sooner since I was aware of what was happening within you.”

“Are you asking for forgiveness?”

“I don’t know, Lena. I have never had to admit that I screwed up, and here I fucking am, telling you I fucked up.” He turned around, peering across the room to where I sat.

I slid from the counter, smirking while he watched me walk toward him slowly. I still didn’t have full control of all my limbs, but I had enough to reach him. Pretending to wobble, he rushed forward, steadying me on my feet. I chuckled, watching his gaze narrowing on me as I recited the spell in my head.

One minute we were in the bathroom, and the next, we were inside a masculine bedroom that smelled delicious, like him. I slipped my hand beneath his shirt, skimming over the hard, chiseled muscles of his chest. Then, lifting on my toes, I claimed his lips gently.

“I can’t miss what I don’t know is gone, Blackstone. I have my family and my son back because of you, and of course, I have you, Lucian. Makenna is here with us, and Lucifer is healing in the cell where you placed him. I have all that I want and need. I am alive because of you, and so what if you set shit into motion? You gave me