Resurrected King - Kaye Blue Page 0,7

was ready two weeks ago, right?”

“Three,” she said, laughing.

“I know you’re excited.”

“I am! And not just because I’m going on my honeymoon. It’s my first vacation ever! I mean, I’d hoped to go to Florida one day. But Bali? Never even imagined it.”

She was beaming, and I matched her smile.

Erin had always been pretty, but she was radiant now, her look one that only pure joy and true love could bring. I was both envious and unbelievably happy for her.

“Well, you know me and travel aren’t on speaking terms, but Bali does sound amazing. And being married looks good on you.”

My heart clenched a little bit, but I ignored that feeling, just like I ignored the pointed look Erin gave me. My aversion to travel was well known, but she was one of the few people I’d ever told why.

“Maybe one day…” she said, looking hopeful but not pushing.

I shook my head. “Nope. I’m good. I have everything I need right here.” I smiled, though I doubted it would convince her of anything.

“I hear you, but take it from me, putting yourself out there can really lead to some things.”

I stuffed the croissant in my mouth to keep from speaking, my mind drifting to the night before. I chewed, buying time to get control of myself, and then gave Erin a slight smile.

“So I need to find a dangerous, mysterious man and ask for his help?” I laughed, not saying that I had a particular man in mind and knowing I would never ask for his help.

She shook her head. “It worked out for me, but maybe not that. Just get out a little. Live.”

The last word was pointed, and I understood all too well what she meant.

But that didn’t mean I wouldn’t ignore it.

“Me? I baked over two hundred pounds of flour last week. Could you call that anything but living?”

I smiled, and Erin laughed and shook her head.

“Just think about it,” she said, sobering.

She wouldn’t push, but the fact she’d said something, even something uncomfortable, only confirmed how much she cared about me.

I didn’t deserve that.

“Sure,” I said, mustering a smile, “as long as you promise that you’ll focus on your husband and not give me another thought.”

“Deal. But I’m gonna be gone at least a month. I’ll call you,” she countered.

“Don’t you dare! And I’ll bet Sasha won’t give you the chance.”

She chuckled. “You’re probably right, but I’ll steal a few minutes here and there.”

“I have a bakery to take care of. I’ll be far too busy for chatter,” I said.

“Fine. But I’ll have Sasha send someone to check on you.”

Instantly, without thought, my mind went to Ghost…Mikhail. And just as quickly, I was hit by twin sensations, excitement of the type I’d never experienced before him.

Excitement at the memory of kissing him, having him kiss me.

Fear too.

But not fear that I’d never see him again.

Fear about what it meant that I so desperately wanted to.

“No,” I finally said, remembering that I needed to talk to Erin out of the idea. “I’ll be fine.”

She looked at me skeptically, then stood.

I did too, and she hugged me, the embrace soothing any rough edges.

“Have fun,” I said as we walked toward the door.

“I will. You take care of yourself.”

“I will,” I promised.

She lingered a moment and then got into a waiting SUV.

She waved right before the large man I could only assume was her guard closed the door.

I waved back, my smile big, genuine.

Joyful.

That joy was short-lived.

Within a few minutes after Erin left, I was hit by bout of melancholy, one that was surprising in its source.

Kissing Mikhail had been amazing, beyond. And in my gut, I knew I’d see him again.

But I couldn’t give in to desire, couldn’t allow the emotions I’d allowed to slip out ruin me.

Because I liked my life.

I had my bakery, my recipes, my friends, everything I needed to keep me safe and content.

Mikhail wasn’t safe.

And neither were the feelings he stirred or the things he made me want.

Five

Mikhail

It took everything, and I mean everything, I had not to go to see her.

After I’d left her after that kiss, I had done my best to put her out of my mind.

What a fucking joke.

Every moment I wasn’t thinking about her I spent telling myself not to think about her.

And the thing was, I liked it.

A lot.

Thinking about her, thinking about anything, really, was different.

Since I had met at Etienne, joined the Brotherhood, I had forced myself to keep my mind clear, empty, focused on