to speak. She smiled nervously and gestured toward the door. “Please, come in.”
I returned her smile and stepped inside the house. Already from the entrance, I was impressed by the rich decor and the cleanliness of the place. I couldn't help but roam around the vast and stylishly furnished living space.
“As you can see, our living conditions are much different than what they used to be,” Trisha spoke behind me.
“I see. Everything is decorated quite nicely,” I muttered and walked to the window, triggered by the noise coming from the outside.
In the backyard, Alessandro and May threw a frisbee and laughed every time Charlie brought it back, but wouldn't let them take it out of his mouth. This was the first time I had seen Alessandro interacting with a child, and I couldn't help imagining how he would be with our own baby.
“Would you like something to drink?” Trisha’s voice disrupted my thoughts.
Slowly, I averted my gaze from the window and spun on my heels. “No, thank you. I'm fine.”
She smiled again, fidgeting with her hands. “Well, please...take a seat.”
I returned her smile out of politeness and ambled to the chesterfield sofa in the middle of the room, easing into it. Trisha took a seat across from me. Once again, we were bathed in silence, as if neither of us was prepared to open Pandora's box and unleash the demons from the past. I took the opportunity to observe her amazing makeover. The old Trisha who took no care of herself was gone. Her hair was trimmed and dyed in a neutral, brown color. She was dressed in nice, clean clothes and her face looked a lot more youthful than I remembered. While I absorbed her changed appearance, she kept her eyes glued on my stomach.
“How far along are you?” she asked, sounding happy and gentle.
“Five months,” I muttered, and once again the awkward silence ensued. I tried to think of something to say. “May has grown up a lot.”
“She sure has. Gosh, she was just a baby when—” she began, and stopped herself, tears once again emerging behind her eyelashes.
“It's okay,” I choked out even though I didn’t mean it.
A sob escaped her throat, and tears emerged from beneath her eyelids. “No, it's not okay. You don't know how guilty I feel because of everything. I should have never let them take you away.”
I swallowed my own tears and shrugged. “But you did...”
“I know. Olivia. For what it's worth...I'm so sorry,” she sobbed. “I don't think I've had a decent night sleep ever since it happened.”
“Well, if it makes you feel better, neither have I,” I confessed as one single tear rolled down my cheek.
“It doesn't,” she mumbled, sounding tortured. “Of course, it doesn't make me feel better. I was a crappy mom to you, but I never meant for you to suffer such a horrible fate.”
“Then why did you do it?” I couldn't help asking. “I gave you the money. I gave you everything I had. Why did you sell me to those monsters?”
“Because I panicked,” she yelled, and burst out crying even harder. “That money you gave me couldn't even cover half of the debt, and that man was threatening to kill us if we didn't pay him. He kept repeating he'd leave us alone if we let him take you. He said he'd treat you well. Your father wouldn't hear of it, but I saw it as the only solution. God, I regretted it the moment it happened. May wouldn't stop crying for weeks. She thought you had abandoned her.”
Those last words made my heart ache, and I gazed at my stepmother through a blur of tears. “Trisha, I don't think you can even begin to appreciate the extent of damage you've done to both of us. Do you have any idea what I've been through in these past five years?”
She gulped. “I know some of it. I know that man lied to us and he had every intention to make you suffer. Alessandro told us he married you under duress to save you and that you were not happy about it. He has refused to let us talk to you or see you, but he has protected us from those gangsters and we were grateful for that. Though, at the time, he made it clear he was doing it for you. He came around quite often and he picked up all of your things...even your diary,” she said, and her eyes built with strange torturous