as if I weighed nothing and—before I knew it—my back touched the mattress and Alessandro climbed on top of me. “No! Don't,” I begged as his weight covered my body. “Alessandro, I will die if you touch me.”
“And I will die if I don't,” he whispered, his hand probing under my shirt.
He was about to touch my scars and I cried out in sudden alarm, falling in a state of shock. I couldn't move. I couldn't breathe. I could do absolutely nothing to fend him off. To my surprise, he froze and stopped touching me, but he still held me immobilized against him. I shivered as he made me look into his eyes that somehow appeared slightly less cruel. “Alessandro, please don't hurt me,” I stammered in panic, fighting to breathe.
“Tesoro...” he murmured gently.
“Please...” I couldn't stop shaking.
“Olivia...”
Desperation took hold of me and I buried my head in the crook of his neck. “Please don't...”
He expelled a harsh breath and his hands closed around my shoulders, gently pushing me away from him. “Stop it!” he ordered. “Stop fucking begging me not to hurt you!”
His deep voice ceased my movements and I peered up at him.
“I'm not going to hurt you.” His voice turned softer, and he caressed my cheek. “Dio, I have almost lost you to a bullet. I didn't come here to cause you pain. I'm here because I need you, Olivia. I need you like I need fucking air to breathe.” He gazed at me with an almost pleading expression. “I'm not going to force myself on you, but I can't make a promise not to touch you. I just can't.”
I stared, breathless and unable to speak. “What does that mean?”
He brushed a lock of hair from my face. “It means I’m asking you to give yourself to me. Tell me you want me. I need to hear it.”
Give myself to him...He said it like it was the easiest thing in the world. The last time he’d seen me naked, he’d just ordered Trisha's murder and had a belt in his hand. I couldn't strip in front of him and let him see the damage of his beating. Instinctively, my eyes darted toward his waist and froze on the black leather belt that hung around his hips. What if he did it again?
“Alessandro, please...leave,” I whispered, my rigid hands clutching the sheets. “I'm not ready for this. I'm still healing—”
“That's not true,” Alessandro interrupted, his jaw clenching. “Don't lie to me. Give me the real reason why you're not ready and I might consider it.”
“I'm scared,” I admitted in the hope he would listen.
“Of what?” he asked softly. “I'm not going to maul you. I promise I won't do more than we've done before. I'll take it as slow as you want me to. I’ll be gentle. Would that make a difference, tesoro?”
Alessandro was kind, and acted as though he cared about my comfort. I had no idea what caused this behavior, but I couldn't allow myself to trust it. It certainly wasn't enough for me to expose myself. I shook my head. “No.”
“No?” he asked curtly, and I nodded. “Why not?”
I cringed. “Because I don't want you to...I don't want...”
“What?” he whispered, and kept his eyes trained on mine. “Tell me, Olivia.”
“I don't want you to see my scars,” I confessed in a silent, broken voice.
Alessandro gazed at me for a few silent moments. Then, he sneered with irony and shook his head, leaning closer. “If that’s the reason behind your rejection, then let me put your mind at ease,” he murmured in my ear. “They're not just your scars. They're mine as well. I'm the one who put them there. No point in keeping them hidden from me, tesoro. I already know what to expect.”
No, please… “They're ugly,” I whispered through a lump in my throat. “They make me look like a freak.”
“Show me,” he requested in a calm voice.
I shook my head with determined rejection. “I won't.”
“I wasn't asking you a question,” he retorted. “Lift up your shirt or I'll do it for you.”
I wrapped my arms around myself, alerted by his threat. “Alessandro, don't be cruel.”
“Tesoro, cruelty has nothing to do with it,” he reasoned in a strangely reassuring tone. “Show me.”
The look of determination in his eyes told me I had no choice. If I didn't do as he told me, he would take matters into his own hands and that was the last thing I wanted. Surrendering to the inevitable, I slowly