Resonance of Stars (Greenstone Security #5) - Anne Malcom Page 0,43
of that, he lunged. Much like the snake did, but I’d been expecting the strike. This one? After today? Not so much.
That was why I didn’t struggle. That was why it was laughably easy for him to get me from my standing position to lying down on the bed with him all but caging me in.
“You can’t manhandle me onto a bed and expect me to sleep with you,” I protested, trying to move—to no avail. “That’s sexual assault.”
His grip tightened. “I can do it and I just fuckin’ did,” he said in my ear. My body shivered with the brush of his lips. He would’ve noted it. I hated that. “And you and I both know that anything sexual between us is gonna be as consensual as fuck. Beyond that, if we’re going to start talkin’ about pinning someone to the bed and label it as sexual assault, how about we mention what you did to me last night.”
I froze.
I thought that I’d managed to escape that situation because Duke was so deeply asleep this morning. But of course not. This was Duke, macho-man. He noted shit even in his goddamn sleep.
What was worse, was he was right. I’d done the same thing to him, without his permission.
“Just let me go, Duke,” I requested tightly, deciding not to comment on his last statement.
“Just go to sleep, Anastasia,” he murmured in my ear, softer this time, closer, but still pissed off.
I tried to move again, more for the statement it made than anything else. Because Duke was right—he wasn’t doing something I didn’t want. His arms around me, his lips at my ear, the heat of his body pressed against me—I wanted that. Too much. Which was the problem.
7
“Pack your bags.”
Delivering that line, Harriet entered without knocking. I jerked slightly from my position sitting in the armchair in front of the window pretending to read. I’d been on the same page for the last hour trying to figure out what the heck was going on with Duke and me.
Last night, somehow, I’d gone to sleep, with the throbbing in my leg, the discomfort in my soul, and Duke’s arms around me.
This morning was even more confusing.
I’d expected him to wait for me to go to sleep and then shove me over to my side of the bed. But no, I’d woken up in exactly the same position I’d been so sure I’d never fall asleep in. My back to Duke’s front, his arms around me.
When I’d woken up, I’d done my best to feign sleep so I could linger in the moment a while longer. I’d never woken up in the arms of a man, not even the man I’d been so sure was the love of my life. We’d have sex—he wouldn’t be overly concerned whether I’d climaxed or not—then I’d skulk out of his bed and find my own in the guest room. I told myself that it didn’t hurt, that Kieran was brilliant and he had curated a certain kind of life, I couldn’t expect him to change himself because of me. I was very good at lying to myself.
The men who came after that didn’t sleep in the same bed as me. Sex and intimacy never mixed.
I’d never even kissed this man with his arms around me, yet I was more intimate with Duke than any man I’d fucked, than the man I’d thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with.
So yeah, I was weak, I wanted to soak up a little slice of it, pretend it was real, store it away for later.
Duke, of course, wasn’t about to let that happen.
His arms tightened around me and didn’t let me go. “Mornin’, baby,” he murmured, voice thick with sleep.
I froze.
Baby?
He didn’t seem perturbed that I wasn’t replying, nor did he let me go. He continued to squeeze, to hold me in this embrace even though there was no reason to now.
Last night, it was to keep me in bed due to a misplaced form of chivalry.
Today?
He moved lazily and didn’t seem to remember that he was meant to strongly dislike me and this whole “couple” thing was just an act.
The covers moved from the both of us and I jerked with the movement, trying to hide myself—another uncharacteristic gesture. I was proud of my body. I damn near starved myself in order for it to look the way it did, killed myself with workouts, spent a small fortune on a personal trainer.