Redesigning Fate (Revive #1) - A. M. Wilson Page 0,83
other loosely gripping my hip. Our breathing synchronizes and slows in a sleepy rhythm. My eyes drift shut and I hear Elias’s deep voice murmur, “Goodnight, love.”
My heart has never been so full, but I can’t help but wonder if this is the calm before the storm. Because nothing good in my life ever lasts.
With that thought, I drift off into what will possibly be the best sleep in my entire life.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Travis
May 12, 2011
The night air was brisk. Duluth is usually beginning to warm up around mid-May, but for some reason that night was exceptionally chilly as the breeze blew up from Lake Superior. A cigarette hung loosely between my lips as I puffed it in contemplation.
I followed her out into that dark, cloudless night, but I didn’t let her see me. Not at first.
It was the annual all night graduation party for the senior class. The high school allowed those who were on track to graduate to have one last big night out together before the end of the year. We still had a few more bonfires after that gig, but the administrators thought it was a way to keep us all safe.
Safe is a subjective word.
Safe to Lena and me is not the same as safe to our peers. What safe truly means to us is not Webster’s definition. We are not safe without each other. I can prove that to her.
The music from the gymnasium drifted into the still night air while I watched Lena make her way across the street to the quiet soccer fields.
I watched as she climbed onto the playground equipment. I watched as she took a minute to swing on the swing. I watched as she danced along the balance beam.
I’d have given anything to know what she was thinking.
Lena hoisted herself up the rope ladder and walked along the brown plank swinging bridge. She rested her arms against the metal barrier; her head fell into her hands.
My heart clenched at the sight of her obvious distress. It twisted further as I saw her shoulders begin to shake. When the sound of her sobs reached my ears, the damn thing broke right in my chest.
Before I had made up my mind, I extinguished my cig and followed. I crept quietly along the woodchips beneath the structure. I didn’t want her to see me, not yet. Not before I could explain myself. I cautiously climbed the metal stairs behind her, perching myself on the ledge.
My new viewpoint gave me a much different angle, and from here, the dim light of a fading street lamp glinted off the metal object in her hand. Silently I hovered, observing as Lena opened the silver tin, the tears shining on her pale cheeks. I watched horrified as she scooped up some of the white powder, brought it to her nose, and breathed it in. I thought my muscles were going to give out as I watched her replicating the move again. Then, as if I’m some masochist, I silently watched her follow up with a third.
As quietly as I could, I slid from my post and took a step towards her. I didn’t want her to know I caught her. That I so selfishly intruded on her private moment like Clair had intruded on me all those years ago.
People like us, who use and abuse and hurt, we all have something in common. Whether it be from fear or anger or shame, we lash out in order to protect our privacy. I understood that. Nobody understood that, but I did.
I didn’t want to destroy what Lena and I were meant to be.
“Hey, what are you doing out here,” I called softly careful I kept my distance. I watched as Lena’s shoulder’s hunched, and she tucked the metal box back into her pocket. Anger sliced through my chest while she concealed her drug of choice. She shouldn’t have had to hide. I understood. I got her like nobody else ever could.
“Hey, I-uh needed some fresh air.”
“Want some company?”
She turned her face towards me cautiously. I’m not even sure she knew who I was. “Sure.”
I nodded, stepping up beside her and mocked her position against the rail. “I’m Travis.”
“I know who you are.”
“Do you want to talk about it?” Her eyes flashed to my face.
“What’s there to talk about?”
“Whatever is bothering you? Why you’re out here alone. Or we can skip all that. Talk about graduation plans or college. Or whatever boring topic you need to distract your mind.”