and squeezed my hand. Hesitantly, I asked, “Is the desire you claim to feel for me the result of the scarab’s pull?”
“You’re asking if I can love you for yourself?”
I nodded, relief and gratitude filling me. He understood me in a way no one else could. He could see into my heart.
Asten studied me for a moment and then slowly, purposely, his eyes never leaving mine, brought my palm to his lips. His kiss so sweet, my entire body hummed. Then, wrapping his arms around my waist, he drew me closer. “The scarab has no sway in the dreamworld,” he murmured, nuzzling my ear. “What I feel for you here is genuine and comes from my own heart. Does that answer satisfy you?”
I nodded.
He pressed a kiss against my temple and continued. “I was a man who usurped another man’s place. Who hid who he was and what he wanted. If all I ever get is to love you in my dreams, I’ll take it and praise my good fortune.”
I was about to protest, but he raised his head and pressed a finger against my lips. “And if, when you wake and decide that the things we’ve said and done were a mistake, I’ll understand. A long time ago, I made a vow never to take what belongs to another man again, especially my brother. But where you’re concerned”—he paused, trailing his fingertips across my skin and down my jaw, leaving little tingles in their wake—“I find oath breaking an all-too-pleasing prospect.”
I leaned into him, a tiny groan escaping from my lips, but he took hold of my shoulders. Pressing them lightly, and letting the cold, unfeeling wind flow between us, he waited for my eyes to open and meet his. “I need you to understand,” he said. “If, after this trial is said and done, you decide that you want to pursue this…this feeling between us, I will. I’ll move the stars in the heavens to find a way to be with you. This I vow.”
I smiled, teasing him lightly, “Do you ask me to trust you, then? A self-professed oath breaker?”
His eyes pierced me. “I would break every oath I’ve ever made or will make just for the chance to capture even a moment of what I’ve seen in my dreams. But the time is not yet, little one.”
Asten paused, watching my expression as if to make sure I understood what he was saying. I understood, unfortunately, all too well. He was saying we should wait. Push the ardent feelings aside and pretend we were simply accomplices until we defeated the Devourer. I didn’t know if I could do that.
I cocked my head in an impish manner, which was very unlike me. “If I agree, would you grant me one little boon?”
“What do you want?” he asked uncertainly.
“I want to experience just one tiny pleasure, even if it only happens in this dreamworld.”
“And what is that?” he asked.
“The feel of your hands in my hair and your lips on the corner of my mouth again. Right here.” I pointed to the place he’d kissed me so tenderly before.
“Ah.” He smiled and I knew I’d won.
“Would you mind doing it again? Just once?” If he rejected the notion, I wasn’t sure what I would do. It felt like my entire being was centered on obtaining this one touch, being held by this one man. At that moment nothing in the world was more important to me.
“Hmm.” He must’ve sensed my desperation because after warring briefly with himself, he gave in and said, “Perhaps I can do one better.”
Breathless anticipation swept over me as his lips came closer. He smiled and stopped, teasing me with the distance but then just as I was ready to cry out in frustration, he cupped my neck, running his thumbs slowly and tenderly over my jaw before he slid his hands into my hair.
Why had I ever thought hair had no purpose? Obviously the purpose of leaving hair loose and long was for this—to have a man run his hands through it and cradle your head as he kissed you. Asten did just that. Tilting my head, he finally, finally touched his lips fully to my own in a perfectly slow, perfectly deliberate way.
His hands were in my hair and then cupping my face, stroking my neck while his lips moved over mine, melting me into a hot pool of sensation. The kiss was heady, exhilarating, and so, so much better than anything I’d