On The Rebound (Steinbeck U #1) - L.A. Cotton Page 0,100

find myself wanting the same thing. Our parents are supposed to love us, Zach. They’re supposed to stand by us and support us. It’s hard to accept that is never going to happen.”

“I hate your dad for treating you like this. Callum too.” My arm tightened around her. “You deserve more, Calli. So much more.”

“I have to make my peace with the fact that I’ll never be the child he wanted. But you can. I watched you play ball with Jasmine. It’s inside you, Zach.” Her hand slipped to my chest, right over my heart. “The question is, do you want it?”

Her words sank inside of me. No one had ever stopped to ask me what I wanted. When you were the little brother of an athletic star, you were neglected, forced into the shadows. When my father had demanded I play for the Bay View Vipers, I’d assumed it was a punishment. It had sure felt like it at first. But slowly, over time, I grew to need basketball the way an addict needs the high. It settled my soul. Soothed some of the anger and pain living inside me. Maybe Calli was right. Maybe all this time, I’d been lying to myself.

I stared up at her, trying to reconcile everything that had happened. Not just right now in this moment, but ever since the first day I laid eyes on her. Calli had been such a vital part of my life, looking back now, it was foolish to think I could ever give her up.

She was the only person to ever get me. To know what it was like to be constantly compared and held to the standard of someone else. But despite all of my old man’s downfalls, he’d never actively pushed me away. He just wanted me to be someone I wasn’t.

Now I was stuck at a crossroads and I had no fucking idea which path to take. The team needed me. Coach Baxter, the college... the fans, they all wanted me to carry them to the championship. Because I was a Messiah, and it was my legacy.

Except, it wasn’t my legacy. It was Declan’s. I was stepping into his shoes, assuming his position. If I did it—if we got to March Madness and we won—I wouldn’t be remembered for my successes, I’d be remembered as the guy who held things together while his brother was lying in some facility fighting for his life.

“I’m so fucking confused,” I confessed. “Nothing makes sense anymore.” A heaviness settled in my chest.

I was stuck here living Declan’s life, like his second-rate replacement. If he woke up tomorrow and defied the odds and walked out of the hospital, I knew I would be cast aside. Because people’s loyalty to me was only good so long as he was out of action. And I’d allowed it to happen. I’d allowed my father to negotiate the transfer because Calli was right, part of me craved his approval.

Deep down inside me, there was a child desperate to shine in his own right. Coming to SU, being needed by the team and Coach Baxter, being praised by my father, it fed my need to be validated. But it was all a lie. A sham. People didn’t really care that I was here, they just cared that they had someone to fill Declan’s shoes.

What a fucking mess.

“I need some air,” I said, gently nudging Calli off my lap.

“You’re leaving?” The hurt in her voice was nothing compared to the dejection shining in her eyes.

“I need some space.” I shot up, running a brisk hand over my face. “Not from you... never from you, but I need time to figure some things out.” My chest was too tight, and I felt like I couldn’t breathe.

“Let me help you.” A smile lifted the corners of her mouth, but it quickly died when I shook my head.

“You can’t, sweet pea.” It came out tighter than I wanted it to. “This is one thing I need to figure out alone.”

Each step away from her was like a knife to the heart. I wanted to stay here. I wanted to strip Calli naked and bury myself deep inside her until nothing else existed, but my head was a fucking mess.

As I reached the door handle, her voice rang out like a shotgun. “Zach, wait.”

I glanced back, my chest squeezing at her crushed expression. I wanted her to beg me to stay, but at the last second Calli’s expression steeled and