body wash, lotion, all the good stuff. Take your time, and make yourself at home, honey. And if you need anything, just let me know. I bet you’re famished, but there’ll be plenty of everything at the party.”
She kissed me on the cheek again, and then went into her room and closed the door. And despite the conversation, music started playing—Lexie and Myles, it sounded like. Loud enough to drown out just about anything.
I went into the guest room and looked around, Rhys with me.
Our hands were still joined, fingers twined, like we’d always been this way. No wonder Mom assumed we were together.
“Your mom is the fuckin’ coolest,” he said. “For real.”
I laughed. “You know, I always loved Mom, I mean, she’s my mom and she’s great, but I never really saw her as…cool, or uncool. She was just…Mom. I wasn’t embarrassed by her, but I didn’t think I had, like, a cool mom.” I gestured in the direction of her room. “That? That’s someone I’ve never met before, in Mom’s body. She’s cool, she’s…casual, confident, funny. I don’t know. It’s weird, seeing her like that, after so long apart.” I sighed. “She seems happier than I’ve ever seen her, though.”
“That’s a good thing, right?” Rhys asked.
I sat down on the end of the bed, and Rhys sat beside me. “Yes. But…god, it’s weird. It’s bringing up a lot of other stuff. Like, if she’s this happy now, how unhappy was she before? With Dad? She’s a whole new person.”
He squeezed my leg. “I think, maybe, that’s a conversation you and her should have together. I don’t think you need to try and figure it out right now.” He smiled, comforting, easy. “Why don’t you take a shower? I’ll go hang out in the living room.”
I snorted. “Rhys, at this point, regardless of what happens between us, I don’t see any point in shyness.”
“I mean, I don’t want to assume anything.”
“I appreciate that.” I had so much to say, so much I wanted.
I wanted him in the shower with me.
Yeah, even in my mother’s condo, with her only a few feet away.
I said nothing. Just got up, walked toward the shower. Peeled my shirt off, tossed it aside. Stepped out of my shorts, tossed them the other way. Naked, then. I felt his eyes. His desire.
I turned, pausing in the doorway of the bathroom. I stared at Rhys. Saw the evidence of his desire bulging against the zipper of his jeans. “Rhys…”
He shook his head. “Not here, not like this, Torie. If nothing else, out of respect for your mother and my own qualms…and as much as I want to get in that shower with you, I can’t.”
I bit my lip. “I’ll be thinking about you, then.”
“What are you trying to do to me, goddamit?” he hissed. “I’m trying to be the good guy, here.”
I felt something reaching a full, rolling boil inside me. “Maybe all good all the time is overrated.”
I went to the bedroom door and locked it. I felt that boiling place inside me bubble over. Spill over. Like a steam engine exploding under too much pressure.
Rhys was just watching me. Sitting on the end of the bed, hands on his thighs, gripping hard.
I had to…do…something. Anything to alleviate the need I felt for him. “This is for me, Rhys.”
“What’s for you?” he asked, his voice a ragged whisper.
I knelt in front of him and held his eyes. I saw the moment he understood, and I saw the resistance, his innate goodness trying to win over his own natural need and desire.
I took my hair of the loose, sloppy braid and let it fall around my shoulders. I did not take my eyes off him.
“This is me checking something off my bucket list.” I unbuttoned his jeans. “It’s me doing something I want to do, for my own reasons. Which I might share with you…later, if you want to know them.”
“Tell me now.”
I shook my head. “No.”
I lowered his zipper. Pulled at the jeans and, despite his obvious misgivings, he lifted his ass—I yanked them off, all the way. He sat in tight gray briefs, the front bulging, tented. He wasn’t all the way there, yet. Good. I wanted to take him from limp to coming.
“Take your shirt off,” I told him. “I like looking at you. You’re a beautiful man, Rhys. You have an incredible body.”
“It’s mostly genetics.”
“Don’t be modest.”
He laughed. “Fine. I haven’t had time to work out since I met you, but I