Ravenous - Helen Hardt Page 0,10

Goodnight, Moon? That’s always a good one.” I grabbed the book and sat down in the rocker, settling Henry into my lap.

So much for not fussing. Henry couldn’t get comfortable. I tried several different positions, but nothing worked. Finally I gave up on the book. I opened Henry’s small mouth and took a look. Indeed, a lateral incisor was erupting into Henry’s sore gums. Poor little guy. Something cold would help. With Henry still on my hip, I rooted through the toy box until I found some plastic teething keys. We walked to the kitchen, where I washed them with soapy water and then opened the freezer.

“Oh, Evelyn, bless you!” Another teething ring sat on the top shelf of the freezer. I replaced it with the keys and held the already cold ring against Henry’s gums. He resisted at first, but once the ring warmed a little, he sucked at it gladly.

“How about that story now?” I said, walking out of the kitchen.

And right into Bryce.

Chapter Seven

Bryce

Such a perfect picture.

Marjorie holding my son, comforting him, helping him with his teething pain. For a moment I let myself imagine that she lived here, that Henry was her son as well as mine, and that I was coming home to my family.

My beautiful family.

She stared at me, wide-eyed, and then Henry reached his chubby little arms out to me. I smiled and took him from Marj.

Neither of us had spoken yet.

Finally, I said, “Where’s Mom?”

Marjorie didn’t meet my gaze. “She ran out to get diapers. I guess the movers lost them or something.”

“Oh.” Diapers. Man, I was a lousy father. My son was out of diapers, and I’d been clueless.

“I’m sorry she had to bother you. I’m home now, so—”

“So I can leave.” Still not meeting my gaze. “I get it.”

I ran back through that horrible note in my mind.

I’m leaving…

I have no emotional ties to you…

Nothing happened between us, and nothing more will ever happen…

You are Joe’s sister, nothing more…

I wasn’t staying away from her.

Of course my mother—not I—had invited her here. And why not? Mom had no idea what had gone on between Marj and me. It made perfect sense for her to call Marj if she needed a sitter. Marj was close, and she loved Henry. Henry loved her.

She finally looked up and met my gaze.

Hurt shone in her dark eyes. Those eyes, usually so warm and caring, were distant, devastated.

Devastation I had put there.

I was a jerk. A major fucking jerk.

She cleared her throat. “He’s eaten. The cold teething ring seems to help his fussiness a little. We were just about to read a story.”

“Da-da!” Henry said.

A grin split Marjorie’s beautiful face. “He’s talking?”

“Just ‘Da-da’ and ‘Ga-ga,’ for my mom.”

She grabbed one of Henry’s little hands. “Such a smart boy! Good for you, Henry.”

“Ma-ma,” Henry said.

Marj’s cheeks pinked.

It was a fluke, of course. Henry made all kinds of silly sounds.

If only it were true. If only Marjorie were Henry’s mama and she lived here with me.

If only…

I wasn’t sure what to say. “Is that a new word, Henry? Did you say Marjorie?”

“Da-da,” Henry said.

Yeah. A fluke.

“I haven’t spent enough time with him for him to know my name,” Marj said.

“Yeah. True.”

“So…I guess I’ll go.”

“Thank you for watching him.”

“I’m happy to help. Anytime.” She turned away and walked toward the doorway.

Let her go. Do the right thing and let her go.

I kissed my son’s rosy cheek. Then, “No. Wait. Don’t go.”

She turned, her expression a mixture of distress and hope. I’d offered her hope with just four words.

“Have you eaten?” I asked quickly. “The least we can do is feed you.”

“I made dinner at home.”

“Oh.”

“But I didn’t eat. I wasn’t hungry.”

I wasn’t overly hungry myself. Rejecting the woman I loved had taken its toll. It was clearly taking its toll on her as well, a fact that made me feel like the lowest of the low. Which was true.

“Oh.”

Great conversation, Bryce.

“Henry already ate. Your mom fed him before she left.”

“Did she eat?”

“I have no idea.”

“She usually waits for me. I’m sure she’s planning something. Why don’t you stay?”

She lifted her brow. “Seriously, Bryce? You want me to stay for dinner?”

For dinner. For the evening. For the rest of your life.

If only I could say the words.

“Sure. My mom would want you to stay. You know, for watching Henry and all.”

“Your mom wants me to stay. Great. What do you want, Bryce?”

I want everything. Fucking everything.

Instead of saying anything, though, I stood like a zombie, my little son squirming in