had not seen Lady Anglesey for nearly ten years—she’d been traveling the month Sabrina had spent at Hilltop Manor, the only time Sabrina had returned to the family estate after her marriage. The unexpected acknowledgment did not lead Sabrina to think their relationship would change, but it was nice to hear all the same.
“So, when do you return?” Nathan asked again.
“I am supposed to arrive in Brighton near the middle of January; I don’t know an exact date.”
“Then if we were to plan for, say, February 20, you would be here in time to help me pick my wedding clothes.”
“The duchess will help you pick your wedding clothes,” Sabrina said.
Nathan shook his head. “She will dress me in the fashion of fifty years ago, you know how she is. That date will give you time, though?”
Sabrina laughed. “It shall be my first priority upon my return.”
“Excellent.” His smile softened. “I worry that my marriage will change the accord you and I have developed these last years, Sabrina. Will you promise not to stay away from London? I shall still need you and want your company. Lady Carolyn would benefit from your help as she steps into the household.”
Sabrina laid a hand on his cheek. “You shan’t be able to keep me away.”
“Things will change, though, won’t they?”
Sabrina lowered her hand and looked past him as if searching for the footman who had gone to fetch her cloak, but truthfully, she was avoiding Nathan’s eyes. She didn’t want him to see her fear for the future. “Things are always changing, Nathan, but we shall adapt.”
“I worry for you, you know.”
Sabrina smiled against the tightening inside her chest. Worrying felt like he did not trust her to manage herself.
“I know you hate for me to say such things, but I would feel such relief if I could see you settled and cared for.”
Sabrina let out a hard laugh that broke the tenderness of their exchange. “I care for myself just fine, Nathan.” She turned toward the door and began walking, but Nathan hurried to keep up with her.
“I know that as well as anyone,” he said, speaking quickly. “If you were to marry, our lives would be in tandem once again, and we could move forward together. Our children would be cousins, go to school together, and—”
“No, Nathan,” Sabrina cut in, looking from one side of the foyer to another. Where was the footman with her cloak?
“Sabrina.” He took her arm and turned her toward him, lowering his voice to a whisper. “I know he was not good to you. I know you are frightened—”
“I am not frightened,” Sabrina said, though that was a lie. “I am content with my situation as it is, that is all.”
“There are men who have asked after you, you know,” Nathan continued, dropping her arm. “They wonder how determined you are to remain independent and if it might be worth an attempt to capture your attention.” He nodded toward the library where his friends were waiting for him, their laughter barely audible. “Mr. Lawson may seem to be joking, but he asks after you continually.”
“Because he has no land and wants mine.” She said the bitter words before she thought better. Nathan pulled back in surprise. She closed her eyes and shook her head, then tried to soften her tone. “I appreciate your concern for me, Nathan, but I have a full and rich life. I want for nothing, not in material or friends and connections.”
She paused, considering how much she wanted to say, and then chose to say a bit more than she was comfortable with in hopes it would help Nathan avoid this topic in the future. “Richard ruined me, Nathan, in more ways than I hope you can ever understand. I have never wanted to burden you with details, but my determination to remain independent is not a flippant decision. Trust me and allow me to find joy in all the beauty of my life, of which beauty you are a part.”
She went up on her toes and kissed his cheek again, which was slack with surprise from what she’d told him. She did not share her burdens with the people she cared for because she did not want anyone to suffer for her sake any more than they already had.
“Lady Carolyn is a lucky woman to have the affection of such a good and kind man, Nathan. I shall look forward to the wedding in February, and I am touched that you