Rage and Ruin by Jennifer L. Armentrout Page 0,149
stupid. If I couldn’t say condom, then I probably shouldn’t be doing what one needed a condom for.
“Yeah.” He turned, holding a small foil between his fingers. “I know that neither of us can pass diseases even if we’d been with anyone, but...”
“Pregnancy,” I whispered, arching a brow. That I hadn’t thought of it was alarming, mainly because I wasn’t sure that could even happen. “Is that possible?”
“I don’t know. You’re not completely human,” he said, coming back to the bed. He tossed it on the comforter, and for some reason I wanted to giggle. “So, probably wise to be safe.”
“Yes.” I nodded, because, hello, not only would a baby be a terrible idea at the moment, there was a good chance I’d be the absolute worse parent known to the history of the world.
Even I could recognize that.
Zayne grinned and reached for his pants. I thought maybe I should look away, but I couldn’t. Not even if a chupacabra tap-danced across the room.
When his pants hit the floor, I had a feeling I would’ve also hit the floor if I’d been standing. The first time we’d kissed—that we’d done anything—the room had been dark, and neither of us had been standing. I hadn’t seen him.
I saw him now, and my mouth sort of dried. I felt a little dizzy and hot—really hot.
“If you keep staring at me like that,” he said, pressing a knee onto the bed and then a hand by my shoulder. “Then this is going to be very disappointing for you.”
“I don’t see how.” I dragged my gaze to his face. “At all.”
He laughed as he settled beside me, placing his hand on my stomach. “Because it would end fairly quickly.”
“Have faith,” I teased. “You got this.”
And he did.
Starting over like it was the first time he’d touched me, he got reacquainted with all the dips and swells of my body with his hands and his lips. It wasn’t until my breaths were coming in short, shallow pants that he reached for that foil and then, after a moment, shifted so that he was over me, his weight braced on one arm as his lower body lined up with mine.
I knew this was it. There was no more pumping the brakes or pulling away, even though I knew if I did, he’d stop. But that wasn’t what I wanted.
Zayne stared down at me, eyes so pale and yet so bright. His lips parted, and I thought... I thought he might say something, but then he kissed me as he reached between us.
There was a pinch, a feeling of pressure and fullness. The feeling stole my breath and Zayne’s. He stilled above me, arms and body trembling.
Waiting.
Waiting until I told him it was okay, and when I did, he moved again, and within a heartbeat, there was no space between our bodies. There was a sharp, burning bite that snapped my eyes open wide.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered, kissing my left cheek, then my right. Another dropped on the tip of my nose and then glanced over my damp brow. “I’m sorry.”
Hands shaking, I smoothed them down his back, feeling his muscles bunched and tensed. “It’s okay. It...it happens.”
“I wish it didn’t.” He pressed his forehead against mine. “I don’t want you to feel pain.”
Pain was a part of life. Sometimes it left scars, physical and mental. Sometimes it led to something worse, and sometimes, like this, I thought it might be a necessary step toward something amazing.
“It’s not bad,” I told him, and it really wasn’t. It was mostly just uncomfortable as his heart pounded against mine.
And slowly, it did become better. For a few minutes, I didn’t think that would be possible, but it did, and when I tentatively moved, the sharp breath that left him sounded like a different kind of pain.
“Trinity,” he gasped as I tilted my hips up once more, and between the sound of my name and the interesting friction, it was becoming more than just better. “I’m trying to give you time.”
“I’ve had enough time.”
“Okay.” His eyes opened. “I’m trying to give myself time so this isn’t over before it even gets started.”
A grin tugged at my lips and then a wild laugh bubbled out of me. I moved, lifting my arms and wrapping them around his shoulders. I kissed his cheek.
“Have I told you that you drive me crazy?” he asked.
“Maybe.” Then, because there was a strange giddiness in me, I nipped his earlobe.