but appearing to be willing her well with his thoughts and set gaze.
A set of harsh trembles invaded me as my mind exploded into a mountain of scrambled words. I was unable to put the words in sequence to form logical thoughts for me to follow. I was losing it along with the only woman I had ever loved.
The walking devil that called himself my father was right about one thing, I loved Mecca more than I ever loved myself. I had fallen head over heels for her almost instantly, although I was too damn stubborn to accept it right away.
Discovering that she loved me back, spoke a new purpose into my life. Her love had caused me to seek out what there was about myself that I could start loving. If someone as precious as Mecca could love me, there was goodness and decency in me that I could love too.
We hadn’t been together long, but Mecca was my everything. With her, I’d begun to live my life for the first time. Every aspect of me had grown more vibrant. Sharing this life with her had opened me to myself, and I was learning what it was like to live, to appreciate, and to grow as a man and a husband.
“Mecca, please. If you leave me, I’ll wither up and die. I know I will. I won’t make it without you. I won’t do this without you.” Eyes blurred, lips quivering, and my heart in my throat, I was a fucking mess.
When she stopped convulsing, I froze. My gaze zoomed in on her shut eyes as her body relaxed.
“No! No! No! Mecca, nooo!” I yelled at the top of my lungs, fully aware that every eye in the room was on me. I shook her, refusing to let her go, refusing to let her slip away. It was too soon. We’d hardly had any time together.
A hand on my shoulders pressed hard, attempting to stop me. The sound of multiple voices called out, telling me she was gone. Fuck them! I wasn’t letting my wife leave me.
“Wake up, love. I need you.” I sobbed, my weeping cries tore from my chest as tears leaked down my cheeks and over my chin.
“Get up, Mecca. You can’t leave. You said we were in this together, remember?”
When the hand on my shoulder slipped down and encircled me, I twisted, shaking the person off.
“Get the fuck off me! I need to help my wife!”
Khane continued to hold on to Mecca’s hand, but his gaze was locked on me. More hands tugged at me, attempting to separate me from her, but I fought them away.
I positioned her so that I could start CPR. I didn’t give a fuck about what anyone had to say, I wasn’t going to let my wife die. Pinching her nose, I cupped my mouth over hers and breathed into her, watching the rise and fall of her chest. She couldn’t do it on her own, so I would breathe for her, for as long as it took.
I don’t know how long I’d been forcing breaths into Mecca, but Khane was right there with me, giving her chest compressions. He was the only one not attempting to convince me that she was already gone. He was the only one that would have been willing to march clean through to the other side of life with me to get Mecca back if that was what it took.
When a force I couldn’t fight dragged me, yelling and kicking away from Mecca, Khane stood and came to my aid, fighting off the group that had gathered at my back to separate me from my wife.
“If she dies because you didn’t let me help her, I’m killing every last one of you. Get the fuck off me!”
I fought like a mad man, throwing wild punches, as my eyes found Mecca laying lifeless on the floor. In my frantic attempts to shove life into her, I hadn’t noticed the large puddle of blood that had pooled around her body. Even at the sight of it, I wasn’t convinced that she was gone. She was still here. I felt her.
“Mecca!” I yelled. My roar shook the walls while I attempted to break free of the multiple sets of arms holding me.
“Let me go. Get the fuck off. Let me help my wife!”
“She’s gone, boss. She’s gone.”
“Mecca!” I continued to yell, kicking and punching. The force of my blows had knocked one set of arms free and