Quest of the Highlander (Crowns & Kilts #5) - Cynthia Wright Page 0,3
on his brow as he struggled to translate what seemed to be a foreign language. “Are ye saying that I am no MacLeod after all?”
Pointing to the miniature, Ciaran said raggedly, “I suspect this man is your true father.”
Fiona had come up behind Lennox, wrapping her arms around his chest. “This changes nothing,” she said, and began to weep.
“How can ye say that?” Outrage boiled up in him. Turning, he held her at arm’s length. “It changes everything! I am not truly one of you. I don’t belong here. No wonder I have always felt it, deep inside. Perhaps I have always known the truth but couldn’t face it.”
“You are still our brother!” cried Fiona. “And the bonds between us run deep. We have shared our lives, Lennox MacLeod! Nothing can change that.”
“I cannot speak of that now. Ye must see how my life has been turned on end by this news.” Lennox pointed again at the face that so closely resembled his. “Who is this?”
“Truly, I know not,” insisted Ciaran. “And Da swears he does not know.”
“Why did ye not tell me?” The notion that the two of them had been sharing this secret, holding it from him, discussing it behind his back, filled Lennox with an indescribable rage and frustration. “Would ye have let me go to my grave believing this lie about my own life?”
Ciaran began to pace, and Fi led Lucien away to the table, where she gave him a small dish of porridge. Lennox knew he should not have carried on in front of his little nephew, but a storm was raging inside him.
“I could not bring ye such pain,” Ciaran replied at last. “I agonized over it with Violette. I feared one day the truth would come out, but I dreaded that time.”
“So even Violette knew.” Lennox clenched his jaw and demanded, “Who else?”
No one asked what he meant, for they must have known full well the subtle ways Grandfather had held Lennox at arm’s length. He’d told himself he didn’t care about winning the favor of the powerful clan chief, since he had no interest in becoming a true Highland warrior. If Grandfather had ordered him to take a position of power within the clan, Lennox would have refused, so he told himself it was all just as well that he was overlooked. Excluded. Not that Grandfather or Da were cold to him, but they’d always seemed rather relieved each time he announced he was going away.
At least I now understand why I never felt comfortable in this world, Lennox thought. And yet his eyes stung, and his heart ached.
When Ciaran pressed a cup of whisky into his hands, he drank, welcoming the sudden burn, the spreading glow, the easing of his torment. After a long minute of silence, Lennox said, “Ye have kept the truth from me since we were lads. How can I now believe that ye do not know who my father is?”
Together, they stared at the miniature. “I want to swear on our bond as brothers, but no doubt that would cause ye to scoff,” Ciaran replied ruefully. “I can only tell ye what I know.”
Fiona spoke up quietly from her seat at the table with Lucien. “I want to hear this as well. If there has been a secret, all our lives, I knew nothing of it!”
Ciaran pressed a hand to his eyes. “When Ma took me away with her, I was so young, I can scarcely remember it—except that I was frightened. I remember being inside a great castle with Isbeil, our nurse, but little else.” He threw up his hands. “Ye may believe me or not, but I speak the truth.”
Lennox turned to look at Fiona. “Isbeil never spoke to you of this while she was alive? Ye were closer to her than any of us.”
“Nay!” she exclaimed, meeting his gaze. “And you well know Isbeil would have died before betraying any secret our mother kept.”
“Then I must go to Dunvegan and demand the truth from Da. He doubtless knows more than he has revealed.”
Ciaran seemed to swallow a protest. “All right, then. I will come as well.”
“And so will we.” Fi stood up, holding little Lucien, and put out her chin defiantly. “Do not refuse me. I am still your sister!”
Although Lennox wished he could use his pain to build a protective wall around himself, he was glad for Ciaran and Fiona’s support.