The Proposal - Kitty Thomas Page 0,58

that I think about it, I realize the tension started the day of the pre-nup because in a very real way I was married to both Dayne and Griffin on that day, but still not yet married to Soren.

People often don't think of marriage as a contract, but it is. They usually try to blend the legal event—which happens behind the scenes as if by magic—with the social/spiritual event that happens in front of friends and family in whatever sacred space they've chosen for the ceremony.

The typical marriage is a boilerplate contract with the state. A pre-nup is a way to legally alter the non-negotiable rules you'd otherwise be forced to follow in the event of breech of contract... better known as divorce. Marriage is the only contract that extends for a lifetime but which you can't actually negotiate the terms of.

I'm not sure why Soren decided not to just make his own private contract with me and leave official legal marriage out of it. We still could have had a wedding. Nobody would have known the reality behind the scenes, but Soren is too traditional—from his engraved stationery to the way he legally bound himself to me—that's why he's the legal husband, not because he's the scariest or has the biggest estate—even though both things are true—but because he's the most traditional even if he tries to hide it.

I watch Soren as he speaks low over the phone from across the room.

“Food will be here in about thirty minutes,” he says when he disconnects the call.

“Huh? It's after midnight,” I say.

“The room service here is 24 hours. I'm not finished with you yet, but you need to eat.”

He's right. Now that I think about it, I'm starving. So much was happening, and I was so scared that I didn't eat very much at the reception. It makes me sad because I pored over about thirty different menu options, and chose food that would have been really delicious if I'd had the appetite for it. As it was, I'd just managed a few bites.

“I wish we had leftover wedding cake,” I say to no one in particular. I literally got the one bite Soren fed me, and that one bite was incredible. It might be the best cake that was ever created, and I got a single bite of it.

“We do have leftover wedding cake,” Soren says. “I can call down and have some brought up with the food if you'd like.”

“Thank you.” I feel so shy right now after what we all did together.

He nods and crosses back to the phone and makes another brief call, then he sits in front of the television in the adjoining room. Everything feels so strange. After what the three of us did together one would think I'd be more comfortable with them, but I'm less. I know they aren't going to just disappear on me now that we've slept together—there are legal documents after all—but I feel more unbalanced than I did when this day began because the reality of being permanently in the bed of three men is finally truly settling into my brain.

I'm on edge because I know so much more is coming on the honeymoon. I would berate myself for agreeing to this except that there's no blame to be assigned to me. Soren took the illusion of free will away, and in this moment I'm grateful for that small kindness.

Griffin and Dayne have moved from stroking my breasts to alternating between kissing them and the side of my neck. I arch first into the touch and mouth of one of them, then the other.

Dayne's hand slides between my legs, and I am suddenly awake and hungry again for something more than food.

I wonder if they'll keep me up all night feeding their insatiable lusts, and I'm grateful we don't have a flight to catch in the morning. The jet leaves when we're on it.

By the time room service arrives Dayne and Griffin have shifted back to innocent cuddling. Soren answers the door and steps aside to allow the food to be rolled in. Shock and embarrassment cover the young attendant's face as he quickly looks away from the sight of me in bed with two men who aren't my husband.

And he knows we're from the wedding. Everyone working at the hotel today knows who is in the presidential suite. And even if that weren't true, it shows in his discomfort at what he's walked in on as well