The Program Page 0,16
I’d brought him to our table, hoping to introduce them, but Lacey was in the lunch line arguing with the lady at the register. Lacey was wearing this ridiculous black-and-white-striped dress that made her look like Beetlejuice, but Miller got this puppy-dog expression on his face. He leaned in and told me and James that she was exactly the kind of girl he was looking for—the kind who would piss off his mother.
I shoved his shoulder, but James laughed from across the table. “Don’t do it, man,” James told him with a smirk. “She’s like a black widow. She eats dudes like you for breakfast.”
And Miller just smiled as if the idea fascinated him. Lacey wasn’t so easy to convince. But when they finally got together, they were happy. They were so happy.
“I’m sorry, Miller,” I say in a low voice. He nods and then turns suddenly to hug me. I rest my hand on the back of his neck as he squeezes me so tight I can barely breathe. I don’t tell him it’ll be okay because I don’t know if I can hope that it’s true.
Just then James walks into the living room, biting into an apple. He looks at us, tilting his head as if assessing the situation. He takes another bite and walks over, leaning down to put his arms around both of us. “Can I have some love too?” he asks in the stupid way he does when he’s trying to make sure we’re not getting too sad. He’s trying to distract us. He kisses loudly at Miller’s cheek, and I laugh, pushing him away.
James straightens, but Miller just stands and doesn’t say anything. James’s expression falters and he shoots me a warning look, as if telling me I shouldn’t have let Miller break down like that. I shrug because I didn’t mean to.
Glancing around the room to figure out what to do next, James walks to the fireplace mantel and picks up the latest family photo. “Man,” he says, looking at Miller. “Your mom is smokin’ hot in this picture.”
“Go to hell,” Miller says, biting his thumbnail again as he hovers in the doorway. They have this same conversation every time James sees Miller’s mom, who is indeed very pretty. She’s single, raising Miller by herself. She has blond hair and wears short skirts, and has a possible crush on my obnoxious boyfriend who she says is going to be a “heartbreaker” when he gets older. Uh, yeah. Not if I can help it.
“I’m just saying,” James adds, walking back over to the couch and dropping down next to me. “If I didn’t have this one”—he hikes his thumb at me—“I might be your new stepdad.”
I laugh, slapping his thigh. “Hey!”
James winks at me and turns back to Miller. “I can teach you how to play catch in the backyard, okay, slugger?”
“Fine by me,” Miller says, his normally amused expression at the joke gone. “I’ll take Sloane in exchange. I need a new girlfriend anyway.”
Both James and I pause in our laughing, Miller adding a new twist to the routine. Only . . . he doesn’t say it like he’s joking. He glares at James, at me, and then turns away. “I’m going to make a sandwich,” he adds, and heads into the kitchen.
James’s mouth opens slightly as he stares after Miller, a bit of pink high on his cheeks. “I think he was serious,” he says, sounding confused. “Why would he say something like that?” James glances at me, his brow furrowed. “Does he like you?”
I shake my head, my stomach knotting. “No,” I say honestly. And the reason it’s so alarming is that we know it’s out of character, that it’s a break in Miller’s personality. It’s a sign we were taught to watch out for. “Should we talk to him about it?” I ask.
James puts his hand over his mouth, rubbing it as he thinks. “No,” he says finally. “I don’t want to upset him any more.” We’re quiet for a long minute, the sound of the refrigerator opening and closing in the background. James looks at me. “And by the way, you’re not allowed to hook up with Miller.”
“Shut up.”
“I’ll make you a deal. You don’t hook up with him, and I won’t hook up with his mom.”
“James!” I go to hit him again, but he captures my hand and then pulls me onto his lap, making it impossible for me to get up. James is so good at making