relationship with Mal takes… We all support you. Right, guys?”
“Of course,” Gunnar said. “Still want to know the details, though.”
“That’s because you’re nosy,” Raven said demurely without looking up from his laptop.
Blade looked meaningfully at me but didn’t ask outright.
I sighed. “Well,” I said, keeping my gaze focused on Grace, because that was easier than meeting the eyes of the curious club members in the kitchen. “I mean, we’ve been friends for a long time.”
“Right,” Raven said.
“So it’s different,” I said, even as my face flushed. “It’s easy to—to get close, because there’s years of history between us. So being friend with benefits has helped us get closer, too, in a way.”
“Closer?” Blade prompted.
“It’s…” I sighed. “It’s complicated. We’re taking it one day at a time.”
I wasn’t ready to talk to the guys about my feelings for Mal, because I didn’t fully understand them myself. How much of this was friendship? How much was just having sex after a long time without it? And—how much of it was real? It was too much to think about. It still made my gut swoop with anxiety, and guilt.
Grace made a pinched face and started squirming in my arms. Well, I was saved, because that was a familiar smell, and one that I wasn’t too keen on dealing with myself. I’d changed more than enough diapers in my time, thank you very much. “Gunnar, this girl needs a change, you want to handle that?”
“Sure,” Gunnar said. He set the knife down, abandoning his chopping task to scoop Grace out of my arms and take her upstairs to one of the available guest rooms that doubled as a nursery when she was here. And, well, that wasn’t the reaction I was expecting. Not from Gunnar, who had been openly terrified of Grace when she’d first come into our lives.
I blinked at Raven as Gunnar disappeared up the stairs. “What just happened?”
“Oh, now it’s Priest’s turn to pry,” Blade said with a grin. “Let’s go check on how this meat for the chili’s coming along.” He hooked a finger in Logan’s belt loop and guided him outside to bother Rebel and Coop.
“So?” I asked, sliding into the seat next to Raven. “What’s that about? Gunnar’s suddenly not afraid of toddlers?”
“Maybe Grace is just especially non-threatening,” he said primly as he closed his laptop.
“Oh, is that it?” I asked.
Raven smiled, small, and a little nervous. “We’ve been talking about it.”
My heart somersaulted. “About what?”
“Having a baby,” Raven admitted. “Either using a surrogate or adopting—we’re not sure yet. We’re still just talking about it. And—” he sighed and squared his shoulders a little bit. “I know it’s fast, but I’ve known Gunnar my whole life, he’s my best friend, the love of my life—it just feels like the right time.”
“I don’t think it’s too soon at all,” I said. I was still reeling—my son, considering a child. I could hardly believe it.
Raven slumped a little in relief. “Really?”
“Really,” I said. I took his hand in mine. “I’m so proud of you. And Gunnar, too. I can’t believe he’s changed his tune.”
“It was Grace that did it,” Raven admitted. “She really showed him that there wasn’t anything to be intimidated by. He’s great with her.”
“He really is,” I said with a shake of my head. “Never thought I’d see the day.”
“He’s it for me,” Raven said a little dreamily. “He’s everything. And I want to start a family with him. The way you did with Dad.”
“You deserve that,” I said, and I meant it. Raven finding love like I’d found with Ankh was one of the greatest joys of my life.
“And,” Raven said tentatively, “maybe you could have that again, with Mal.”
I started, pushing back in my seat a little. This was not where I was expecting this conversation to go. “Now, you know I wouldn’t be doing anything at all with Mal if you didn’t support us, but I’m not intending to get that serious with him.”
“Good luck with that,” Gunnar said as he descended the stairs with a freshly changed and happily chattering Grace in his arms. “I didn’t intend to get serious with Raven, either. And here we are now.”
“Where’s here?” Raven teased.
“Planning a kid,” Gunnar admitted. “If you told my twenty-year-old self this was where I’d end up, I’d’ve laughed in your face.”
“Well, fatherhood looks good on you,” I said with a smile. “And I can’t deny that I’ve always wanted to be a grandfather.”