The Price of Inertia (The Seven Sins #4) - Lily Zante Page 0,94

cloaks all of our needs and desires, keeps the secrets of the way he uses me, and the way I let him. We’re not normal people in a normal relationship. We don’t go out to dinner or hang around outside like normal people. We don’t go for walks, or go to the park, or out with friends.

I try not to have illusions of what this is, but being here alone and with not much else going on in my life, Ward provides me with something that is lacking from my life. I’m scared of what will happen when time runs out for us.

Today was the first time we were out together. I was hoping to do something that might get him unstuck and help him to move on but when he hides so much of himself away from me, what chance do I have?

He’s hurting.

Visiting a place like that will have an effect. I bring my laptop downstairs and wait for him in the kitchen in case he feels like talking. I look for new jobs online and update my resume. I even consider calling Danny again about that job he told me about. Then I hear a noise and I stare at the door, wondering if it’s Ward leaving the study and coming to find me.

It’s not. Ward isn’t coming. I wish he would talk to me. It doesn’t always have to be about sex. I wait for him until just after midnight, and then I go upstairs to bed.

I curl up in bed and just as I find my eyes getting heavy, the door opens. My eyes fly open. A lamp flickers on and Ward stares down at me, looking rougher than ever. I sit up. “What’s wrong?”

“I can’t sleep. Can I sleep here?”

My heart takes a leap so big, I’m scared it might jump out of my chest. This is a break from the usual. I move over and pat down the place where I had been sleeping, the bed sheets are warm and slightly ruffled. He climbs in beside me. “Sorry to wake you.”

“Don’t be sorry.” Because I’m not. I’m ecstatic. He lies on his back, his hands clasped behind his head and those sexy, bulging muscles peaking out from the sleeves of his t-shirt. I lift up onto my elbow, loving my new view, loving that he has willingly come to me. Longing swirls in my heart, and my belly begins to quiver. Could I be any luckier? Feel any happier?

After today’s visit to his childhood home I don’t expect him to have hit his daily word count but my heart is soft, and I want to smother him with every ounce of love I feel for him. I’ll reward him anyway, only, this won’t be a reward. This will be me taking care of him. I’ll do anything to take his mind off those dark times he has suffered.

I move towards him and stroke the sharp pointy strands of his five o’clock shadow. Slowly, slowly, slowly, my hand slides lower but he shifts, moving his arm, and taking a hold of mine. He stops me. “Not tonight. I’m not in the mood.”

I put a finger to his lips. “Shhhh.” Of all the things he could have said and done, it’s this that fills my heart to overflowing. He came to me. He wants to be with me, and not just for the sex. He needs me.

I want to bury my face in his chest and put my arm over him. I want to nestle against his warm skin. I want to touch his body, but neither I nor he will be able to hold back if that happens. I need to stay away and put a few cold inches between us. So, I lie on my side, with my hands reluctantly away from him, and I stare at his side profile, admiring his biceps as if I’ve seen them for the first time all over again. After a while I switch the lamp off.

I must have drifted off to a good sleep, because when I next awaken, I feel groggy. I’m a light sleeper and I stir and instinctively open my eyes when Ward shifts.

It must be early in the morning because in the blue light of a new day, I find myself staring at his back. He’s sitting on the edge. I reach out to touch him but he gets up. I wait to hear the door open and then close. He’s starting