“Just don’t talk,” I reply crisply. “It’s so much better when you don’t.”
I feel his smile against me, and secretly, I smile too. Something is definitely wrong with us. We fall asleep like that, and the terrible truth is, I’ve never slept better in my life.
“Your timing is off, Alexa.”
She jerks her eyes up to mine, flinching as if I slapped her. “What?”
What the heck is her deal? Why is she so skittish around me?
“You’re a second behind everyone else. Just want to make sure you’re okay.”
She nods, but I don’t believe her. More and more, I’ve noticed that she seems distracted at practice, particularly with Audrey gone. It’s like some of these girls don’t know what to do without their fearless dictator around to give them orders.
“Well, if you need to talk, I’m here,” I offer lamely even though I know she’s one-hundred-percent team Audrey.
She blanches, and my offer only seems to add to her distress. But there isn’t time to contemplate the reasons for that now because Coach is calling us out onto the field for the halftime performance. It’s amazing what a difference in energy there is without Audrey here to torture everyone with her evil glares and catty remarks.
The crowd goes wild for us, cheering us on as we perform the routine flawlessly. It makes me feel alive, and instinctively, my gaze drifts to Landon’s across the field. His hair is damp and messy in that sexy way, and I finally understand what the authors in my favorite books mean by panty meltingly hot. That’s exactly what Landon is right now. His beautiful, powerful body is pure catnip to all the feline eyes in the stands tonight. Or basically anyone with a pulse and functioning retinas. When he catches me staring, he smirks, and I turn away quickly as we return to the sidelines to watch the game.
He left this morning before I woke up, but my sheets still smelled like him. His warmth lingered on my skin when I washed myself in the shower. When I closed my eyes and touched myself between my thighs, I replayed the scene of him under the hot spray the night before, bracing himself against the wall with one hand while he stroked himself with the other.
He blew his load on my loofah just to be a dick, and the diseased little fiend at the helm of my insanity refused to throw that away either. Now all I can seem to think about is how the hell I’m going to navigate the rest of the year when I’m so twisted up inside.
I came back here with vengeance on the brain, and so far, all I’ve managed to do is let Landon slip through the cracks in my defense. I need to regroup and reassess my strategy. Because this is exactly what he wants. He’s weakening my shields with his sly smiles and infuriating comments. He’s an actor at heart, and that’s what makes him so dangerous. There’s no way to discern what’s real and genuine from what’s just a script to him.
When the game ends, I’m the first one off the field. I can’t risk bumping into him in front of our classmates because I’m not ready for that. I don’t trust my face not to betray everything that went down in the pool house last night. Space. I think that’s what I need right now.
At home, I tap furious thoughts into the journal app on my tablet and draft a hundred apology texts to Courtney. I don’t send any of them because what can I say? That I’ve given up my revenge? Because I haven’t. I get where Court is coming from, but she couldn’t possibly understand what I feel.
Still, I miss her more than anything. It’s so tempting to call her or walk to her house. But I can’t bring myself to do it. We are in a cold war at school, passing each other in the halls without a word and sitting at different tables for lunch. This is the longest we’ve ever gone without talking, and I’m not sure how to fix it anymore.
My head is pounding as I toss my phone aside with a growl. It’s already after midnight, and the noise from the party next door is grating on my last nerve. I’ve come to expect these parties at Landon’s every weekend, so this isn’t unusual by any stretch. We both agreed we would go right back to hating each