giving you fair warning, so I’d get rid of it if I were you.”
If Brix doesn’t already suspect I’m gay, it’ll be impossible to hide if he picks me up and throws me in the pool.
And as he steps toward me, I jump up and run toward the stairs leading to my bedroom.
“Fine. I’ll go swimming.”
I usually wear board shorts with nothing underneath when I swim, but that’s not going to hide the inevitable hard-on I’ll get watching my insanely ripped bodyguard all wet and half-naked.
I find a pair of Speedos and slip them on first and then my boardshorts over top. Yeah, this isn’t going to help. I cup my package through the material.
Why does he have to be so hot?
All the way downstairs, I try to steel myself to get through this, like I’m preparing for days of mental torture. Because I am.
I can already imagine what Brix looks like with next to no clothes on. I don’t need to see the real thing.
I realize that as soon as I reach outside and sink my feet into the grass in the backyard that no amount of preparing myself will be affective.
Brix is doing laps, his long arms powerful and strong. The muscles in his back contract with every stroke, and he pushes through the water as fast as a damn torpedo.
And I’m already hard.
Yep, that took zero point three seconds.
Brix hits the wall and grabs onto the side of the pool, lifting himself up to sit on the edge. His body shoots out of the water as if in slow motion. Or maybe that’s my brain slowing it down so I can watch all the water rivulets drip down his skin.
Well, that filled my spank bank reserves for the next decade.
“Coming in?”
“Going to make me?” And now I’m taunting him. Smart, Harley. Really smart.
Brix swings his legs over the side of the pool as if to come get me, and I flinch. I do not need this man’s hands on me right now.
I want them on me for sure, but nope, nope, nope.
“Okay, okay, I’m getting in.” I go to the opposite side of the pool and slip into the cool water, but even the low temperature isn’t enough to put out the heat in my groin. I swim around trying to get my dick to deflate.
“Enjoying your break from writing yet?”
“No,” I grumble. I should’ve put sunblock on because the sun is high and hot today. I’m so going to burn. “I should be working.”
“When was the last time you came out here and enjoyed the view?” He slips into the pool and swims to the wall that faces the wide panorama that is LA and its surroundings.
I want to fight the urge to go to him, but I know I’ll lose, so I don’t even pretend like I’m going to try. I swim over to him but make sure to leave a few feet between us. “I don’t think I’ve ever used the pool before. Evah has, but …” I shrug.
“How long have you lived in this house?”
I count. “A little over a year? I bought it a few months after Eleven broke up.”
“And you’ve never been in the pool? Doesn’t that tell you you’re pushing yourself too hard? Working too much?”
“I need to push that hard. I need to work that hard.”
Brix’s lips press together. “Why?”
That empty part of my soul screams loudly. Because I don’t have anything else.
“I just … do.”
Brix isn’t satisfied with my answer, and I can’t blame him. I’m not happy with it myself. But I’m not going to admit that I throw myself into music to drown out that loud noise in the back of my brain telling me that love doesn’t truly exist.
I’m destined to be alone as long as my career is my first priority, so why fight it?
Brix inches closer to me, and I hold my breath. He lowers his voice. “You know what you have to do, then?”
“What?”
His lips turn upward just slightly. “Play harder.”
Next thing I know I’m under the water with this big mountain of a man pushing me down.
I’m torn between enjoying the zing of pleasure from his touch and wanting to shove him and struggle against him. In the end, air wins out. Because I kind of need that.
He lets me come up, and I splutter as I hit the surface.
“I’m pretty sure drowning me is on the list of things you shouldn’t do as my bodyguard.”