The Pool Boy - Nikki Sloane Page 0,89
it was the case. “Who else stayed over?”
When his eyes shifted away, the pain in my chest was back.
“Just me,” he said quietly, “but seriously—nothing happened. You have to know that.” The rain pattered against the windows and hurt welled in his voice. “How could you think I’d do that to you?”
Was he kidding?
“Oh, I don’t know,” bitterness filled my mouth, “maybe how I spent a year of my life fucking oblivious the man I loved was having an affair?” I lifted my gaze to the ceiling to stave off my emotions. “Christ, I can’t believe I made the same mistake with you so fast.”
I’d said it without thinking, and the meaning in my words filled every breathable inch of space inside his Jeep.
Troy went wooden. “Love?”
He’d latched onto that word, and I needed to put distance between it and us as quickly as possible. I couldn’t love him. It wasn’t possible for me to fall in love this quickly. This feeling of drowning in him was just the newness of our relationship.
“If nothing happened,” I said, “then why lie about it?”
He was still dazed and struggled to pull himself back together. “I’m sorry I did that.”
“I appreciate the apology, but that’s not an explanation, Troy.”
He frowned. “Okay, this is going to sound bad . . . but I did it because it made sense not to tell you. Because of your ex, I—”
“What the fuck?” My eyes widened. “You meant easier. It was easier not telling me.”
“So, we could avoid this?” He gestured between us. “You jumping to conclusions? Yeah. What your ex did to you was beyond shitty, but I am not him. I don’t cheat. I’ve made it crystal fucking clear what I want, and it’s not someone else, not Stella, and definitely not some other dude. I don’t want anyone but you.”
The rain was heavier now, pummeling the Jeep and the roar of it filled the silence between us. As it dragged on, I grew more upset.
And worried about what this meant for our future.
“It would be easier to believe you,” I said, “if you hadn’t just lied to me.”
His expression was a mix of remorse and frustration. “I’m sorry. It was stupid and I wasn’t completely awake when you—”
I lifted a hand, cutting him off. “I’ve been in the business a while. I know better than to take every story or picture at face value, because clicks matter more than the truth to a lot of people. There has to be trust between us, so I can believe you when you say nothing happened.” I swallowed painfully. “But now that trust is gone.”
“I know I fucked up.” Worry etched his handsome face. “I’d take it back if I could, but I can’t. All I can say is I promise it won’t happen again.” He hesitantly reached over and trailed his fingertips over my cheek, pushing my hair back behind my ear, and I wanted to soften at his touch. His voice fell to a whisper. “Can you at least believe that?”
The storm overhead beat down on the car in slashes of rain, and I was grateful for the cover. Not just with how it prevented Charlotte from seeing us—because I was sure she was watching through the front window—but how secluded it felt.
For a brief time, it had created a bubble where my negative thoughts had a harder time penetrating my mind. But my devil’s advocate spun up and told me all the reasons why he’d lie and leave me for someone else.
That what we had might not last.
And it would be better to cut my losses now.
Save myself from more pain down the road.
He searched my face, trying to figure out why I hadn’t said anything, and his eyes widened in concern. “You’re looking at me like you think we’re doomed.”
I didn’t want to put it out in the universe, but the words came from me anyway. “Are we?” I whispered. “It’s only going to get harder when you blow up.”
Oh, he didn’t like hearing that. “So . . . what are you saying? You want to give up? Just because I made a dumb mistake and things might get hard?”
Did I want to give up?
My thoughts were a mess, and when I didn’t respond immediately, he withdrew like I’d slapped him. Surprise and hurt painted his expression, and the temperature in the car plummeted twenty degrees.
“You know what?” he snapped. “I’m tired and kind of hungover, so maybe you should go before I