Player - A Deadliest Lies Novel - Michele Mannon Page 0,72
the car and pulling my door open before I can process what’s happening. Taking my hand, he tugs me across a field and leads me up a small hill. I glance over my shoulder and gasp, “The car door is still open.”
“This won’t take long.”
He digs into his pocket.
My eyes go wide at the condom. “Now?”
He unbuttons my shorts and tugs them off with my underwear. Without a word, he tackles me to the ground and proceeds to kiss me so aggressively, so passionately, every worry disappears. He lifts his hips and wiggles, the brush of his pants on my legs as he shimmies free.
The top of his hand brushes against my stomach. His kiss relentless and all-consuming.
My eyes flash open and lock with his as he thrusts into me. Knowing he was watching me this entire time is a turn on, despite his somber blue eyes.
What’s wrong?
He circles his hips and I gasp at the delicious stretch. Finn wasn’t kidding when he boasted about his size. Every time we make love, he finds a new way to remind me of it, too.
I try wrapping my legs around his hips but he’s not having it. Instead, he spreads my thighs wide and pins me to the grass with his body, hips flexing and, with full force, fucks me into the earth. I feel everything, the soft cushion of grass, the cloudless blue sky, his tongue mating with my own, inches and inches of hot muscled body pressed into mine.
My climax comes from nowhere. Quick and furious, like our lovemaking. My body shakes as I go wild beneath him. “Finn. Oh, Finn. Finn. Finn.”
He slows and breaks our kiss. Controlling each movement as he gazes into my eyes. I see everything, his kindness, his heroism, his love. Us together, joined in a way that transcends this moment, this time. He pushes deep and settles inside me, baby blue eyes shining bright and pupils darkening as he milks his release for all it’s worth, as if he never wants it to end.
We lay together afterward breathless, my rapid heartbeat an echo of his.
I can’t move.
I don’t want to be the one to break away first.
After what feels like an eternity, he soundlessly lifts up and off me. And though I know it’s irrational, my hormones kick into overdrive, and tears form. I love this man.
And this feels like goodbye.
I scramble to my feet and duck my chin, hiding my face. We dress without talking. Except . . . why is that? No smart comments? No teasing parlay that’s become our normal routine?
I struggle to get a grip on my emotions and take a few seconds to smooth out the wrinkles in my shorts.
The light touch on my arm makes me jump.
“You have grass in yer hair.” Gently, ever so gently, he combs his fingers through my locks.
My heart stills. Time stills.
His eyes skim over me.
“Better?” I whisper.
“You have never looked more beautiful.” All the tension and worry leaves my body in a long, drawn-out exhale. He cares. And maybe, just maybe, he loves me as well.
I don’t ask him but simply bask in the moment.
We have time.
I catch sight of the car, and so does Finn because he stops in his tracks to scratch his head.
Car doors wide open, engine running, and a park job a three-year-old child might make.
“Jaysus,” he rumbles.
And I laugh, all my worries disappearing with that single word. Because if this isn’t proof that Finn wants me—desperately—I’m not sure what is.
33
Finn
Irish guilt is worse than the flu. It clings to yer soul, suffocating and painful. It lingers until you can’t breathe, can’t think straight, can’t get out of the funk of it. I hate myself for what I’ve done, for what needs to be done.
Clarissa’s suspicious, and rightly so. But trusting. Too feckin’ trusting. And she’s giving me space, room to wallow in my remorse.
I’ve wracked my wee brain all the way across Ireland for a different ending. Only to realize that this is the happier alternative. She’s in the way. She’s collateral damage. I’d be a bleeding eegit to think Hayden’s sudden epiphany about love will soften his concerns about her involvement. No, there’s only one option, and death isn’t it.
Follow orders and keep her safe.
She won’t see it that way once she checks her files and fully realizes the extent of my deception. She’s going to hate me and believe everything between us was a lie.