want to make love to my gorgeous wife in our new driveway.”
“Hey, where’d you go?” Camila asked, bringing my attention back to her. “It’s like you were here, but you’re not. Are you okay?”
“You really need to learn how to mind your own business.”
The hurt expression on her face made my chest ache, but she quickly recovered.
She didn’t waste a second, putting me in my place, spewing, “I’ll tell you what, I’ll learn to mind my own business when you learn not to be an asshole.”
“Cami—”
“Camila!” She opened the door to my car, making me realize we were sitting in the driveway.
How long had we’d been here?
“My name is Ca-mi-la, it’s actually really simple to pronounce. Maybe you should start there. Learn my name first, it might help with the process of not being an asshole.” She got out, slamming the door behind her.
I scoffed out a chuckle, shaking my head. There was no denying the fire that lived inside of her, and now it lived inside of my house as of today.
How long until it exploded? Burning us both alive.
I shoved away the thought.
She’s here for your kids, Aiden.
For. Your. Kids.
By the time I had my shit together, she was already inside. I grabbed her suitcase, making my way behind her. Instantly, I was slapped in the face with my baby girl who was beyond happy seeing Camila walk toward her from her play pen.
“Ma! Ma! Ma!” she shouted, bouncing up and down against the side. Holding onto the railing for balance. “Ma!” she repeated, so fucking excited. Engraining the word deep into my heart.
Where all I could see…
All I could feel…
Was the family I’d always wanted.
“Hey, Little Miss.” She picked Journey up, placing her on her hip to bounce some more. She wrapped her chubby little arms around Camila’s neck, clinging onto her like she never wanted to let her go. “I’m not your momma. My name is Ca-mi-la,” she emphasized each syllable the same way she had just done for me in the car.
Journey pulled away, and grabbed onto her face, once again repeating, “Ma!”
“Okay, we’ll work on my real name later.”
It seemed as though I stood there, watching their mannerisms and banter for hours, smiling on the outside while my heart was breaking all over again on the inside. I couldn’t take it any longer.
It was too far.
Too genuine.
Too. Fucking. Fast.
I reached my limit with the overwhelming emotions I voluntarily brought into my home. Seeing the way they were on camera, like they truly were mother and daughter, didn’t affect me as much as it did seeing them interact in person in that moment.
For the first time in a long time, things felt right.
She felt right.
Being here…
For Journey.
My kids.
For me, too?
I growled, pissed off I was allowing my mind to wander there, and she hadn’t even fully moved in yet. The remorse was eating me alive, feeling as though I was cheating on my wife when it couldn’t have been further from the truth.
I’d never betray Bailey. Not like this.
Suddenly, our eyes locked from across the room.
Camila whispered, loud enough for me to hear in Journey’s ear, “Wave hi to your daddy. He loves you so much.”
Journey turned, narrowing her bright blue eyes at me that reminded me so much of her mother’s. Her intense stare never wavered from mine as if she remembered last night and didn’t know what to think of me.
Or worse, I was a complete stranger and she didn’t know how to react to me.
Camila was the one to break her concentrated demeanor, adding, “It’s okay, Little Miss, he’s your daddy and sometimes daddies turn into beasts. Just wait until you start dating.”
Journey smiled, giggling like she knew what Camila was saying.
Although things were tense between us, it didn’t stop Camila from trying to develop a bond between my baby girl and me.
“Can you say ‘Da’?”
Journey answered her, “Ma!”
Camila shrugged it off, gazing at me. Silently trying to find a middle ground amongst us all.
I was the first to cease our connection, instantly feeling ashamed I did so.
Why?
“You’re making a stinky,” Camila announced, now lovingly looking at Journey. Playing it off like my withdrawal didn’t just hurt her feelings.
Again, why?
“It’s okay, your daddy has that effect on people. They poop themselves while he’s around.”
I grinned.
“Let’s go get you cleaned up.”
I watched them leave the living room, overcome by a sense of loss when all they were doing was walking to another room.