The Piano Man Project Page 0,29

life, if he turns out to be an axe murderer.’

‘Axe murderers don’t usually live with their mothers,’ Nell said.

‘Norman Bates?’ Honey said, after a moment’s thought.

Tash made stabbing motions in the air over the table. ‘Just don’t let him follow you into the bathroom.’

Honey shook her head. ‘Tell him it’s off, Nell. I mean it.’

‘I can’t,’ Nell said. ‘I’m off work on Monday so I won’t see him.’

‘Long weekend, Nellie?’ Tash said. ‘Lucky you.’

‘It was Simon’s idea, actually,’ Nell said. ‘We don’t really get much day time together; we’re both always knackered with work and then with Ava at the weekends. It’s sort of an us day. Ava’s going to Simon’s parents as usual.’

Honey and Tash nodded slowly.

‘A you day,’ Honey mused.

‘And did he suggest that before or after he saw your new underwear?’ Tash laughed. Nell huffed, pink cheeked, and then laughed too.

‘After.’

She sipped her drink demurely, clearly bursting to say more. ‘Oh my God! Girls, he was …’ Nell paused and searched for the right words. ‘Well, let’s just say he was impressed.’

‘Good on you, Nell,’ Honey smiled.

‘Good on Simon, more like!’ Tash said. ‘So what’s the plan for Monday?’

Nell’s eyes sparkled. ‘That’s just it. I don’t even know! He just told me to book the day off but still take Ava to his parents as normal. He was so … so masterful!’ Her voice practically quivered, making Honey wonder how the usually mild-mannered Simon had morphed himself into Heathcliff behind closed doors over recent weeks.

‘And has he presented you with any new sex toys over breakfast this week?’ Tash asked.

Nell swallowed and shook her head. ‘No. But girls, I have to tell you, that vibrator …’ She lowered her voice and glanced from side to side to make sure no one overheard the local primary teacher discussing sex aids, and then leaned in towards Honey. ‘You should have bought one when we were in that store, Honey,’ she murmured. ‘I don’t actually think you’d have any choice but to orgasm. Seriously.’ Her big round eyes glittered.

‘She’s right, Honeysuckle,’ Tash grinned. ‘All those electrical impulses concentrated on one little spot.’

Nell did the shivery, quivery thing again and glanced at her watch, probably itching to get home to sexed-up Simon.

‘Fine. I’ll buy a vibrator if we can ditch the piano man thing.’ Honey glanced from Nell to Tash, who frowned at each other. ‘Deal?’

Her friends shook their heads.

‘No deal,’ Tash said. ‘This is a job for a man, not a machine.’

‘Are you sure you don’t want to call the banker and check?’ Honey joked half-heartedly, knowing that they weren’t going to let her wriggle off the piano man hook. She was just going to have to hit the ready meal aisle so as not to poison this Robin guy on Friday, and hope like hell that he wasn’t an axe murderer, because it was highly unlikely Hal would bother coming to her aid if she screamed.

Glancing at her watch again, Honey pushed herself off the couch and headed for the counter. It was three minutes after midday, and she needed a glass of wine.

A couple of hours and a couple of glasses later, Honey turned the key and let herself back into the square, cool lobby. What was Nell thinking? She didn’t know this man very well at all, yet she’d invited him into Honey’s home.

‘I need whisky,’ Hal shouted through the door without preamble, more like a testy ninety-year-old than a sexy thirty-something. ‘And cigarettes.’

‘You don’t smoke, rock star,’ she called, debating whether she was glad he was speaking to her again or not, given his tone.

‘I’m going to start,’ he yelled.

Honey flicked her eyes towards the ceiling. ‘No, you’re not.’

‘Did my mother die and leave you in charge? Have you adopted me, Mary Poppins?’

‘You know what, Hal? Piss off. I’ve had a nice morning, I can do without you spoiling it.’

Honey stood still in the silence, waiting on his reply. Had he taken her at her word and pissed off?

‘I take it today’s date was better than the last one then,’ he said, more quietly, more honestly, more Hal.

‘It wasn’t a date,’ she said. ‘I’ve been with Tash and Nell – you know, my friends. I have got another date on Friday, though.’

‘You’re not giving our Deano another chance, are you? Because a man who doesn’t walk you home won’t get any better second time around, you know.’

‘What do you think I am, an idiot? Of course it’s not Deano. It’s someone called Robin, if you must