Mitzi carried two cups of tea to the table and went back to pour her grandmother’s coffee.
“What did you do?” Paula asked.
“I hope you snatched him baldheaded and then slapped the thunder out of him for not having any hair,” Fanny Lou said.
“I glared at them until they looked up at me. As cocky as they were, I’m pretty sure they were infected with short-man’s disease, because it didn’t take them long to get their order and get out of there. They didn’t look familiar,” Mitzi said, “but they’ll be telling tales tomorrow about the big red-haired Amazon who threatened to whip them with one arm tied around her back.”
“And with egos like they’ve got, they’ll say that they left you bleeding on the floor right beside the cinnamon bun display,” Paula laughed. “You should’ve at least put a curse on them. I’ve given you enough through all the years that you could’ve picked out one that was appropriate.”
Mitzi pushed her tea to one side and poured herself a cup of coffee. She dipped a doughnut into the mug, not caring that crumbs fell back into it. “Oh, come on, Paula. Last time I got mad at someone, you said to never put a bad gris-gris on anyone, because what goes around comes around.”
“You got one of them curses I can have?” Fanny Lou asked. “I’m mad at Jody’s mama. She whispered in my ear after church last week that I should be dressing to live up to my image. I might be the richest old gal in Celeste, but that don’t mean I have to get all gussied up. My knit pantsuits were good enough fifty years ago, and they do just fine today. Besides, I knocked the mud off my boots on the way in the doors, and God ain’t told me that I have to do anything more. Until He does, Wanda can keep her mouth shut.”
Jody’s chuckle oozed sarcasm. “You’re lucky that’s all she had to say. She’s always bitchin’ to me about something. I’m livin’ in sin or else God is punishing me by making me barren until I marry Lyle properly.”
“Well, if Paula wasn’t so stingy with her curses, we could take care of two birds with one stone,” Fanny Lou said.
“You could throw salt over your shoulder next time you see Wanda. In the Cajun world that means you don’t want her to step foot in your house again,” Paula said.
“I wouldn’t let her in my front door if she knocked, which she won’t because I took up for Jody when she and Lyle moved in together.” Fanny Lou reached for another doughnut. “‘What goes around comes around’ will apply to those men and to Wanda for saying such ugly things. But enough about that. It’s nine o’clock and time to open the front door for business.”
“You’re right, Granny. We’ve got a wedding dress to get ready for a final fitting this afternoon,” Mitzi said.
“And you’ve got an appointment with Ellie Mae to help her design one this morning. So get rid of all that anger.” Fanny Lou sipped her coffee.
“I’ll need an apple fritter to get that done.” Mitzi grabbed the last one in the box.
“Poor Preacher Frank will probably breathe a sigh of relief when he gets her married off.” Fanny Lou lowered her voice. “You know what they say about preachers’ daughters? Well, she flat out passed the test on that one.”
“For real?” Jody asked. “You mean she don’t have a halo up under all that blonde hair?”
Fanny Lou snorted. “Honey, that girl might be an angel, but if she is, it’s because she’s done had the hell screwed out of her.”
Mitzi almost choked on the pastry. “Granny!”
“Truth is truth. You can sugarcoat it or roll it in cow crap, and it don’t change a thing.” Fanny Lou shrugged. “I got to go to the beauty shop and get this mop of hair washed. I ought to get it cut off, but my darlin’ Oscar liked it long. God rest his soul and love his heart.” She rolled her eyes toward the ceiling. “And if you’re up there flirting with Henrietta Cooper, I’ll wring your neck when I get there.” She focused on Mitzi. “Y’all got any other news I can take to the beauty shop?”
“Nothing I can think of,” Mitzi said.
Fanny Lou finished off her coffee and carried the cup to the sink. “See y’all later.”
They all three waved as she breezed back out the door. Jody picked up