Percy Jackson's Greek Gods (Percy Jackson and the Olympians companion #5.5) - Rick Riordan Page 0,53

“That’s good stuff! Could I get a doggie bag to share with my friends back home?”

“Holy me!” Zeus swore. “Absolutely not! This ambrosia and nectar is rare and magical stuff. You can’t go sharing it with just anybody.”

“Oh…” Tantalus forced a smile. “Of course. I see how it is. Well…next time, dinner at my place, huh?”

Tantalus should’ve let it go. He should’ve remembered what happened to Prometheus when he tried to take stuff from the gods and share it with mortals. But Tantalus was angry. He felt insulted. The gods didn’t trust him. They didn’t want him to become famous as the mortal who brought ambrosia to earth.

The more he thought about it, the angrier he got. He invited the gods to a feast at his palace, but to get back at them, he decided he would serve them the most insulting meal he could think of. He just wasn’t sure what.

He was standing in his kitchen, staring at the empty cooking pots, when his son Pelops walked in.

“What’s for dinner, Dad?” Pelops asked.

Tantalus had never liked his son. I don’t know why. Maybe Tantalus knew the kid would take over his kingdom someday. Greek kings were always paranoid about stuff like that. Anyway, Tantalus gave his son an evil smile and pulled out a butcher’s knife. “Funny you should ask.”

That night, the gods gathered at Tantalus’s palace for dinner and got served a pot of yummy stew.

“What is this meat?” Demeter said, taking the first bite. “Tastes like chicken.”

Tantalus had meant to wait until all the gods had eaten, but he couldn’t hold in the crazy giggles. “Oh…just a family recipe.”

Zeus frowned and put down his spoon. “Tantalus…what have you done?”

Hera pushed her bowl away. “And where is your son Pelops?”

“Actually,” Tantalus said, “that’s him in the stew. Surprise, you idiots! Ha, ha! Ha, ha!”

Honestly, I don’t know what he was expecting. Did he think the gods would chuckle and slap him on the back? Oh, Tantalus, you old kidder. Good one!

The Olympians were horrified. After all, they still had post-traumatic stress from getting swallowed by their father, Kronos. Zeus pulled out a lightning bolt, blasted Tantalus to ashes, and turned the king’s soul over to Hades.

“Make a special punishment for this one,” Zeus said. “Something involving food, please.”

Hades was happy to oblige. He sank Tantalus up to his waist in a pool of fresh water, his feet stuck in the riverbed like in cement. Over Tantalus’s head hung the branches of a magical tree that grew all sorts of luscious fragrant fruits.

Tantalus’s punishment was just to stand there forever.

Well, he thought, this isn’t so bad.

Then he got hungry. He tried to grab an apple, but the branches rose just out of reach. He tried for a mango. No luck. He tried jumping, but his feet were stuck. He tried pretending to be asleep so he could launch a surprise attack on the peaches. Again, no luck. Each time, Tantalus was sure he would score a piece of fruit, but he never could.

When he got thirsty, he scooped up water, but by the time his hands reached his mouth, the water had magically evaporated, and his hands were completely dry. He bent down, hoping to gulp straight from the lake, but the entire surface of the water shrank away from him. No matter what he tried, he couldn’t get a single drop. He just got hungrier and thirstier, even though food and water were so close—tantalizingly close, which is a word that comes from his name. Next time you want something really badly but it’s just out of reach, you’ve been tantalized.

What’s the moral of the story? I dunno. Maybe: Don’t chop up your son and feed him to your dinner guests. Seems kind of obvious to me, but whatever.

Another guy who got a special punishment was Sisyphus. With a name like Sissy-Fuss you have to figure the guy had issues, but at least he didn’t make his kids into stew. Sisyphus’s problem was that he didn’t want to die.

I can relate to that. I wake up every morning and think: You know what would be good today? Not dying.

But Sisyphus took things too far. One day, Death showed up at his house. And by Death, I mean Thanatos, the god of death, the Grim Reaperino, who was one of Hades’s main lieutenants.

Sisyphus opened the door and found a big guy with black feathery wings looming over him.

“Good afternoon.” Thanatos consulted his notepad. “I have a delivery for Sisyphus—one