herself and sworn she’d be stoic. But this, the love and truth she saw in everything he said, it was too much. So much more than she’d dared to wish for.
Relief. She hadn’t anticipated the crush of pure relief that shoved away the festering fear that came with the burden of cancer. He was here for her. He would be there to hold her strong. She could fight with him. Would fight it with him.
Her lip quivered and she bit it to hold it still. “Thank you,” she croaked, reaching to swipe at the tears rolling down her cheeks, but he beat her to it, thumbs catching the wetness before he claimed her lips again.
The kiss wove through her, found every crevice of resistance and filled it with his love. Soft and tender, it was the side of him so few got to see, and she treasured it even more. How could she possibly have thought of giving this up? Him up?
The cancer.
The lead bomb of reality slammed back in to remind her of the other reason why she’d come here. She broke the kiss with a soft peck and brush of her lips. She took both of his hands in hers, grip tight on the uninjured one.
“I have an appointment in an hour for more tests.” His hands flexed around hers, but his expression remained neutral. “I was wondering if you’d come with me. There’s not much you can do, but—”
“I’m there,” he cut her off, answer firm. “Let me jump in the shower and we can go.”
“I understand if you have practice.”
“It’s a day off.” He kissed her temple as he stood. “It wouldn’t matter anyway. You’re more important.”
“No.” She vaulted up, adamant on this point. “Your career is just as important. I won’t let you jeopardize it for me.”
He stared at her, frowning. “That’s my call, not yours.”
“No, it’s not. You can’t stop your life because of mine.” There were too many people who’d already done that. Her brothers, who’d all bypassed college. Her parents, who still worked to pay her medical bills. She refused to add him to the list.
His face softened into something close to wistfulness. “And what if I’m not stopping it but finally living it?”
Now she was confused. “I don’t understand.”
“Let me ask you something,” he countered. “Why don’t you play in a band?”
She almost flinched at the touchy question, but she had her stock response ready. “I don’t have time. Between work and school, there’s no room for one right now.”
“But you’re going to school for a performance degree, right?” She nodded, slow and hesitant about where he was going. “What do you plan to do when you graduate?”
“I don’t know.” She hadn’t let herself think that far. “It might not matter.”
“Then we’ll figure it out together.” His calm reassurance wasn’t what she’d expected. Nor his easy dismissal of the subject. He kissed her quickly and took off toward the bedroom. “I’ll be out in five.”
Her legs buckled the second he was out of sight. She dropped to the couch, head landing in her hands. They’ll figure it out together—six months from now. He was planning on both of them being around that long. Of them still being together. That was terrifying and exhilarating.
She blew out a shaky breath and sent up a silent prayer for a miracle. She’d been granted two before. Was there any chance she’d get a third?
But if she was going to get one, why would that same entity give her cancer again in the first place?
Chapter Twenty-Nine
“I’m not sure how long this will take,” Jacqui told Henrik.
He squeezed her hand, her fingers still chilled despite his firm grip on them. “I’m fine,” he reassured her for the tenth time. He kissed her temple, willing his support into her. Her fretting over him meant she wasn’t focusing on her tests, and he could deal with that.
She nodded, lip tucking between her teeth as she stared at her lap. She was going to nibble her lip off if she didn’t stop the nervous habit. He tapped her chin, sliding his hand up her cheek to urge her to look at him.
The stark fear was clear in her eyes, the deep brown showing what she usually kept hidden from him. He knew there was strength in there too though. A strong will and determination she just needed to remember. He’d help her remember.
“We’ll get through this,” he promised, meaning every word. “No matter what happens, you have me now. I’m