Outlaw (Wolves of Royal Paynes #4) - Kiki Burrelli Page 0,24
free. "I'm not jumping through your fucking hoops, Diesel. If you will take me, take me. If not, then say no so I can ask the next person."
While I spoke, Diesel's frown deepened until I was sure there was a mirror image of it poking out on the backside of his head.
Knox cleared his throat, leaning against the banister as he watched our conversation. Diesel must've been distracted if he hadn't noticed Knox's approach. Or maybe he was just getting older. I snorted. The old impulse to save the thought for when I wanted to try to make Diesel ravish me next returned on a wispy wind that was gone just as quickly.
"Nothing here is your business," Diesel grunted.
Knox just smiled.
"I don't like this, Quin. I don't know why you want to go back there. There isn't anything left, ba—Quinlan. It's just ash. Everyone, everything."
My heart ripped apart like the Yellow Pages in the hands of a bodybuilder. My stomach jolted, and I hunched forward slightly, like I'd actually been hit. Rebecca couldn't be ash. She'd had too much life, a light that had shone so brightly it was impossible to imagine the world without it. But, if Diesel had returned to pack lands, finding me gone and Rebecca alive, she'd be here. Diesel would've taken care of her.
Tears, hot and urgent, pressed against my eyes, and I desperately blinked them away. If we were roleplaying the Diesel and Quinlan of before, this was when Diesel would've wrapped me in his strong arms and rubbed my back until I calmed down enough to talk about it. That was before, not now.
I swallowed down a cocktail of tears and sorrow, wiped my face clean of the nonexistent tears, and met Diesel's gaze with my hardest look. "I want to go."
Diesel stared me down, his face never changing unless you looked at his eyes. Those two orbs flashed with emotion, desire, anger, worry. His lips twisted into a scowl. "Fuck!"
Diesel's same expletive repeated four more times—three if you counted Huntley and Jagger as one. As soon as I'd told the other nephilim Diesel would take me, they wanted to go too. I got the feeling they had always been curious. They'd possibly wanted to go before but, for whatever reason, hadn't asked. I understood for me it was a little different. The pack lands were the last home I'd known.
And it was gone.
Diesel had been telling the truth. I'd spotted the destruction the moment I'd expected to see a familiar ridge of trees. They'd been my favorite to climb as a child.
When he'd said ash, I'd imagined a campfire. In there would be soot and charcoal, but still some semblance of what it had once been.
The trees were gone, but not only the trees. The grass, bushes, hill…what could destroy a hill?
Diesel continued forward. The closer we got to the central spaces, where most of the people lived, the more there was left behind, but even that was being kind. The charcoal pieces were just larger here. He stopped the car, and I tried to picture where we would've been pre-hellfire. Maybe in the rec hall? The theater?
"The preschool," Diesel replied, and I couldn't be sure if I'd spoken out loud or if Diesel could read my thoughts. If there was any place in the world where he could, it would've been here.
I let his answer settle in my gut, committing this feeling to memory. One man had stolen so many lives. He couldn't be left with his. I'd come for closure, but all I wanted now was revenge.
6
Diesel
I loathed the anger that settled on Quinlan's features.
It wasn't that I didn't understand. He'd already lasted longer than I had before exploding. At least we'd been able to come to the awful realization gradually. Quinlan had to take it in all at once, knowing without a doubt that everyone was dead.
I parked, rushing to unbuckle and get to the other side of the vehicle where Quinlan's boots stood among the ash. I'd expected his wraiths to drape near him, and in this place, I'd been counting on that fact. I didn't like Quinlan so exposed to the aftermath. I didn't want him anywhere near this fucking place, but letting Knox indulge my mate when I refused to just wasn't going to happen.
"Rebecca's house is this way." I headed south. Having mentally mapped the barren landscape years ago, I could walk the ash in the same paths I'd walked with Quinlan.