Outlaw (Wolves of Royal Paynes #4) - Kiki Burrelli Page 0,1
into reverse. "I'm taking you home."
His eyes widened, and he pressed on his seatbelt, exploding from behind the restraint. "What? No! Why? You haven't even kissed me!"
"Kissed you? Quin—"
He lunged over the center console.
He didn't have the power of a shifter, not even an adolescent shifter. He wasn't particularly strong for a human, either. Pushing him away would've been easier than blowing a feather aside, and if I had, I could've gone my entire life without ever knowing what Quinlan's lips felt like against mine. Now, I'd never be able to forget his hot kiss, the way his lips shook along with the rest of him. He was nervous and excited and smelled like the forest after the first autumn rain.
He smelled like he was mine.
Not mine to watch over or dote on—though he was still that too.
He just wasn't only that. Not anymore. Not now that I knew the perfection of his kiss. He was so young and yet...
Fuck. Diesel, you're a fucking piece of shit.
It didn't matter what his kisses felt like. It only mattered that he was Quinlan. His innocence needed to be protected, not stolen. Especially not by someone like me. I was a hammer, and someone as precious as Quinlan required a far gentler touch.
When I brought my hands to Quinlan's shoulders, a moan breathed past his lips. There wasn't anything I wanted to do more than to swallow his sounds and taste his tongue, but what sort of a man would I be to take advantage of a mind so impressionable?
"But I'm out of school now. There's nothing keeping us apart. You don't have to stay away from me like that anymore. I've seen your eyes linger on my body. Only recently, and only because I'm watching. I'm telling you I know what that means. And that I want it. I want you."
Jesus, fuck! When had Quinlan gotten so mature? It felt like just last week I was promising him a wolf-back ride around the pack lands if he'd sit for his shots at the doctor. Now, he was kissing me with lips far too eager, saying things I wouldn't even let myself acknowledge.
"I'm not—" Right for you. That was what I needed to say, that Quinlan was too good for a wolf like me.
I was big, so people assumed I was strong. I was that too, but not strong enough to push away that blue and black gaze. Not when his eyes tilted like they did when he was hurt.
I pushed his body back, gently urging him to his side of the truck seat. "It's still too soon."
"Too soon?" Quinlan parroted softly. He frowned and bit his bottom lip. "But just that, right? It's just too soon? You do want me, right? Diesel?"
Fucking, fuck, fuck, fuck! Did I want him? Did a drunk want whiskey? "Fuck!"
Quinlan whimpered, and jerked his shoulders back.
I'd never raised my voice to him, and seeing his fear now wiped away my misgivings. Yes, he was still too young to do any of the things he'd taken me up here to do, but I wouldn't demean his intelligence pretending there wasn't anything between us. My wolf had always been drawn to Quinlan, and that connection wasn't one that had remained static. It grew, matured. "I'm sorry, Quin."
Finally, I let myself pull Quinlan into my lap. He came easily, his body pliant and trusting despite the way I'd just scared him.
"Did you curse because you don't? You don't want me?" he whispered meekly against my chest.
"No, baby boy, I do want you. But even though you're done with school, it's still too soon. You just graduated. You need to experience more of the world first. Meet some—people."
His lips twisted into a scrunched circle. "You want me to date?"
My snarl shot out of my chest, forgoing the usual route through my mouth. Somehow, I managed to bite the words out. "If you want."
It wasn't fair to Quinlan to stop him from living and having the normal experiences a guy his age should have. Even if it would kill me—if I had to get drunk and have Knox and Faust chain me to a chair somewhere—I'd let Quinlan date…if he wanted to.
His wide, innocent eyes searched my face.
What did he see when he looked at me? What was he looking for? All I knew was that I desperately wanted to be enough. And just the fact that this boy made me desperate was a good reason to keep him at arm's length.