to. He didn’t want to be having to explain the basics of consent to Lorenzo.
Lorenzo nodded. ‘I know. I feel sick about it. Because if you hadn’t – I mean, I didn’t think I was doing anything wrong. But Becky says I should’ve known better. Her text was pretty brutal. She didn’t pull any punches. And she’s right. And I’m really fucking embarrassed.’
‘Not to sound like your dad or anything, but I’m proper disappointed in you.’
‘I know.’
Lorenzo sat down in the armchair across the room. Daniel drank. Lorenzo stared at the floor.
‘It’s just not that hard, you know? She doesn’t have to say no for it to not be a yes.’
‘I know,’ said Lorenzo, shaking his head. ‘I know that now.’
Daniel didn’t know how to end the conversation. He was so, so mad that his flatmate could be so stupid.
Ah, that’s interesting, he thought to himself. You called him flatmate and not friend.
And just like that, Daniel had inserted the emotional distance between him and Lorenzo.
‘I’ll go and plate up this food,’ Daniel said, eventually. ‘I appreciate you cooking.’
35
Nadia
Weeks passed. Nadia saw Eddie a few times a week and spent most weekends with him. He’d met both Gaby and Emma only once, since they both seemed increasingly hard to get hold of, but they’d liked him and said encouraging things, and yes, Gaby had texted afterwards to say: Listen, he’s wonderful, but before you get in too deep I really do think you should meet Sky Garden Guy! Like, really, really!!!!!
Nadia had texted back a GIF of one of the Real Housewives of Atlanta shaking her head and saying, ‘Nooooo, thank you!’ and neither of them had brought it up again. Nadia just needed Gaby to understand that she was fine as she was. She’d said herself Eddie was a good guy. What was she supposed to do? Forever believe that good was not good enough, and that she had to strive for amazing or earth-shattering? No. Nadia was happy with Eddie, who was everything a boyfriend should be. Kind of. Probably. Okay, she was forcing it a tiny-weeny bit, but what choice did she have? This man was very into her, and she’d be crazy not to be into him too. And she did love his company. Her heart would catch up with her mind.
She did want to see her friends more, though. She wondered if it was her fault that it had been a few weeks since a brunch, or lunch, or drinks. That she’d been sucked in to the early throes of passion, of romance, and had maybe neglected her friendships a bit.
She’d started going into work later, choosing to have five more minutes with Eddie’s lithe frame curled around her own, snuggled down under the duvet as the leaves on the trees outside of her window turned from bright green to golden around the edges, September pulling in. Arriving at the office later often meant working through lunch to make up the time, so she didn’t get to walk to the market with Gaby for burritos. Not being home alone meant not being able to sit in front of the TV with her phone in her hand, texting Emma about their days, or what they were watching, or about the dates they’d just been on or had planned.
Nadia made the decision to book in a friend date – she didn’t want to be that girl. The girl who let her whole life slip away from her because of a man. She didn’t feel trapped or like she had to shrink her life in order to make room for Eddie. With him, it was more like he was fun to be with, and she liked being around him. She loved being part of a two. Finally, she was with a man who was caring and generous and sensible and knew his own mind. It would be weird if she didn’t want to see a lot of him, wouldn’t it? Plus, she liked who she was when she was with him: she laughed a lot, and said witty, funny things.
‘Babe,’ she said, one night at his place, down in Peckham. ‘Do you mind if I bow out of movie-night Thursday?’
In less than a month they’d settled into a routine that meant they went down to the Rio in Dalston for the 8 p.m. showing of whatever was on and then walked to her flat. They’d made a silent pact that it didn’t matter what it was – they’d