and force that wouldn’t break her, but one that sent me over the fucking moon my damn self. When my orgasm hit, I managed her off my cock and pulled her down to my chest as I skeeted into our bellies while holding on to her for dear life.
“And you’re worried you hurt her?”
Shit. “I don’t know. I guess, yeah, but I don’t know how. Maybe,” I mumbled.
“Maybe what? Maybe you hurt her physically? Psychologically?”
“Both?” was my hurried answer.
“Well, I do agree with her: no one’s ever died from losing their virginity, at least no one I’ve ever heard of. So, it sounds to me, she made her experience what she wanted it to be.”
“But to want it full throttle last night, and then to damn near break my fuckin’ back to ride me this morning? Her shit’s got to be broken right now. Right?” My brows shot up.
NormaJean chuckled, voice silky and calm. “You’re well-endowed, Ashton, I will give you that. But I doubt she’d try again this morning if you broke her last night.” Then there was a pause, but not as long as what she gave when I told her I’d fucked Tori and she was a virgin. I thought the line had gotten cut. “Why are you freaking out?”
“What do you mean?”
“There’s something you’re not telling me. I know a few women you’ve fucked before settling down with little Miss Aivery sunshine, and never have you given them a thought past making sure the condom didn’t break after a long, hard fuck.”
Condom…
My eyes closed, anguish amped. I didn’t use a fucking condom either time with Tori. It was a shameful act I wasn’t ready to give thought to. Didn’t want to.
“You’re talking about shit that happened when I was seventeen, eighteen years old. I’m twenty-two. This girl is only nineteen. Of course, I’m going to be thoughtful when handling her. I’m not that much of an asshole,” I murmured into the phone, peering behind me.
I sat in the living room facing the large windows. After our shower, I cooked breakfast and Tori and I lay down in the bed for a bit until she fell asleep. I was the restless one this time, and got up to come into the living room. A while ago, I heard Tori go into the bathroom, which meant she was up from her nap.
“You’re no asshole at all, Pooh. Don’t say crazy shit like that. It’s not what I was implying at all. I just don’t want you getting weirded out by what’s simply a young girl who likes what she likes and doesn’t come with the need to be handled princess-style. Some women are in control of their sexuality. They’ve read enough, heard enough, and listened enough to chart their own sexual paths from the start. Maybe that’s who this KaToria really is.”
It wasn’t. I knew it. What NormaJean didn’t know about was Tori’s sexual abuse as a child and how awkward it made her journey to her sexuality. That journey that led to me…last night. I didn’t want to fuck up anything for her. I may have been an asshole to her as a Panther when she first got to BSU, but that damn sure would not continue to her first sexual experience. I gave a fuck about that.
About her…
Tori ambled into my peripheral, shoulders and face low. She stopped at my outstretched legs.
“You good?”
“Yeah. I guess,” NormaJean answered quizzically, thinking I was asking her.
“My bad. I was talking to Tori,” I explained.
“Oh…” NormaJean replied.
Predictably, Tori lifted one shoulder. I waved her down to me. Surprisingly, she didn’t dither. Her long, toned frame climbed my reclined body like a baby would its parent. Her arms encased me as much as the sofa chair allowed, and Tori tucked her forehead beneath my beard.
“NJ, I’mma hit you later. Tori’s up.”
“Oh.” She chirped, hesitantly. “Okay. Don’t forget. We need to chat about our annual New Year’s outing.”
“You got it.”
“Bye, sweets.”
“Later, little lady.” I tapped to end the call and peered down to try and look at Tori; though she was so close, it wasn’t possible. “Everything okay?” She was in the bathroom for a while.
I couldn’t tell if she nodded or shook her head, and was grateful when she mumbled, “My period came on.”
Then I was fucked up all over again, not knowing if that was good or bad.
“Were you expecting it?” She answered with her head again. “Nabby-girl, I don’t know what that means.”