One More Time - Louisa George Page 0,54

wanted him back.

He wanted a family. More than anything.

And more than that, he wanted to share it with Gabby.

Gabby.

Max stood and shook out his tight muscles. Needed some air to unclog his throat. To think about his next step. ‘Thanks, Mitch. Really. Thanks. I’ve got to go.’

‘Anytime, mate. You know where I am.’

‘Sure thing.’

Max walked out of the hospital, through the car park, over to the patients’ garden, where he found a bench lit by a slither of moon.

Someone had planted a peace sign made out of squat purple bushes, and a border of bright scarlet flowers. They reminded him of his sky garden. Of her. Of what she’d brought into his life. Hell, everything reminded him of her. The Auckland skyline, sunshine. The hospital. His apartment. He looked at everything touched with her image or smell, or some memory.

He cared for her. That was the truth.

Love? He didn’t know about that. Couldn’t define it in such simple yet complex terms. But she was special. And he wanted her. Maybe they could agree to some sort of commitment. Make a first big step.

Even thinking about that word sent shivers running through him. This was so far out of

his comfort zone he didn’t know what to do. Say. Think. But he had a gut feeling they should try and take this to another level. He just had to wait out the hours it would take to fix her.

And while he sat it occurred to him that Mitch was way more evolved than he was. He had a girlfriend and a child. People he could share things with. To help him relearn the truth about love. And he wanted that so badly. With Mitch. With Gabby. Trouble was, he was scared. Because he knew that sometimes the truth hurt, too.

Finally, the obs and gynae reg sauntered along the corridor as if he’d simply been to the park and not just saved a life. ‘Hey, Max, she’s out of surgery now. It was a bit of a mess really. Her right fallopian tube was just about to blow, so we removed it. But her left one is scarred too. She has grade-four endo.’ The doc smiled gently and put his hand on Max’s arm. ‘I’m very sorry, but the chances of her getting pregnant naturally again are virtually impossible and very risky.’

Whoa. Hold on. This was too much to take in. Pregnancy? ‘How far along was she?’

‘Five, six weeks. We could talk about assisted fertility anytime you want. There are options.’ Endometriosis. Infertility. All added up to a bleak future. But she was safe and alive. And that’s all he damned well cared about. ‘No. Thanks. I don’t need to talk about this right now. I need to see her.’

The doctor shrugged. ‘Of course. When she’s out of Recovery we’ll take you up to the ward.’ ‘I’ll walk her up from Recovery.’

‘You and I both know that’s not a good idea.’ Yeah, well, he hadn’t had many of them recently.

She’d been pregnant. With his child. And had nearly died.

God. Clearly due to their recklessness. The Pill had failed, probably due to the vomiting bug they’d all had. He was surmising. Trying to make sense of it.

Had she known? He didn’t think so. And now he had to tell her not only had she lost her baby but she may not be able to have any more. Not without intervention. And there were never any promises there.

She didn’t want kids—she’d told him that. And neither did he. He hadn’t ever given it much thought on top of not settling down. Not having kids had completed that picture for him.

But this—this was a game-changer. Emotions he hadn’t known he had welled up inside him.

A baby. His baby. A father.

Wow.

No one had warned him about the intense possessiveness a man could feel just hearing a word. One simple word. And the crushing hopelessness. The heavy weight that pressed on your chest and stole your breath. The pumping of adrenalin. The way for a second the joy unfurled enough to create hope, before it was whipped away on a senseless, cruel wind of reality. A father no more.

Truth dawned, crystallised in front of him. He did want a family, to be a father, to give a child the kind of things he’d never had.

It was a shock. It was too cruel to realise that now, when it was too late, that he wanted what Mitchell had.

Without giving a second glance to the doctor, Max stalked away.

His pacing