One Moment Please: A Surprise Pregnancy Standalone (Wait With Me #3) - Amy Daws Page 0,103

I brace for his answer.

He purses his lips and pulls his T-shirt over his head, avoiding eye contact with me. “Don’t ask me questions like that, Lynsey.”

“Why not?”

“Because you won’t like the answer.”

And there it is: The truth I hadn’t allowed myself to consider.

“Do you think you’ll ever love this baby?” I ask, my voice wary as realization settles like a pit in my belly.

He shoves a hand through his hair. “You don’t get it, Jones.”

“What don’t I get?”

“If I love this baby, then I can’t see clearly. If I let my feelings get involved, then what happened to Julian could happen to you…or the baby. I need to keep a safe distance so I can take care of you.”

“So that’s your long-term plan? To be a robot dad and husband?”

“Yes,” he responds dryly.

I hold my hand to my chest as a sharp pain shoots through me at his admission. He’ll never love me. He’ll never love this baby. I struggle to take a breath, needing the wall to keep myself upright. Through my ragged breaths, I choke out my reply, “And you didn’t think you should tell me that at some point?”

“It doesn’t fucking matter because it doesn’t fucking change anything,” he snaps, his eyes turning to slits. “Nothing will ever change this situation.”

“I hate that you’re still calling this a situation.” I close my eyes and force myself to inhale and exhale slowly. Tears falling down my face are the pain inside forcing its way out. “It’s like we’re right back to where we started. We haven’t moved forward even a fraction of a step. How could I be so stupid?”

I turn on my heel, fighting back the nausea this conversation has brought on. This is too much. This is too painful. I can’t put myself through this. Taking a deep breath, I march out of the room, heading to my bedroom to grab my bag.

I blindly shove things in it, underwear, pants, shirts, sweats.

I really wish my hands would stop shaking.

Josh appears in my room with a grave look on his face. “What are you doing?”

“I’m leaving,” I croak, my emotions bubbling over. “I should have left a long time ago.”

“You’re not leaving,” he states firmly as I move past him to head into the bathroom.

“Watch me.” I cram toiletries into my bag, willing my tears to stop. He doesn’t deserve my tears. He doesn’t deserve me.

Josh stands, clutching the doorframe like a lifeline. “Where will you go? Your parents’?”

“I’ll go to Dean’s.” I relish the sting that answer will provide. “He’s a good friend. He’s supportive. He actually loves me.”

Josh’s grip tightens on the wood trim, a crack echoing off the bathroom walls. “Of all the people you could go to…it has to be him?”

I shrug defiantly. “I want it to be him. I need someone who’s going to love what’s going on inside me. Someone who won’t treat me and this baby like a patient or a mistake. Dean’s never treated me like that. His initial reaction to this was ten times better than yours.”

“So that’s it? You’re just done with me?” he growls, his eyes growing red around the edges. “Never mind the fact that we’re engaged and that child you’re carrying is half mine?”

I plant a sick smile on my face while my spirit crumples inside me. I wish I could stay. I wish I could let him take care of me and be what he is and not need anything more from him. But it’s not enough. And it never will be.

With shaky hands, I remove the ring from my finger, and it’s like I’m stripping off a mask that I was a fool to think I could wear in the first place. I set it on the bathroom counter and move to stand in front of him, bag on my shoulder, chin raised high. “Josh, I was willing to marry you because I thought there was potential here. I thought you could grow to love me, and crazy enough, I assumed you’d love this baby. But I realize now that you’re not going to change because you can’t let go of your past. I’ve been delusional in thinking you could because all I’ve ever been…all this baby has ever been…is an obligation to you, not a new beginning. And we deserve better.”

“Fuck that,” Josh says, pulling his hand off the doorway long enough to rear back and punch the wall beside it. He steps forward and gently cradles my face, his