You smell like almonds and sunshine,” I tell him. The drunk in me is speaking now.
He blinks at me for a moment, then his smile deepens. “That doesn’t sound so bad.”
“It’s really not.”
I sit up and he puts his hand on my shoulder to help me.
Then leaves his hand there.
His other hand is on my bare thigh.
I swallow, noticing the goosebumps on his arm.
“You have goosebumps,” I say quietly. “That song really does it for you.”
He glances at his arm and then slowly meets my eyes, giving a small shake of his head. Something in his gaze changes, no longer playful. His smile fades.
“No,” he says thickly. “It’s not the song.”
His fingers press into my shoulder.
Eyes smoldering.
He licks his lips.
And for a moment, we aren’t on the grass outside the loos at an INXS concert. We’re nowhere at all. It’s just empty space and it’s him and it’s me, and every wire that has tightened between us over these last weeks is close to snapping.
Once they snap…
“Papà!’ Vanni’s voice dissolves the world.
It was there, and now it’s gone.
The roar of the concert comes back and Vanni is running over.
“Stai bene? Why are you on the grass?” he asks, looking down at us in surprise.
“Your father dropped me,” I tell him, throwing Claudio under the bus so that Vanni doesn’t pick up on the fact that we just shared one very strange and fleeting intimate moment.
Vanni looks heavenward. “I told you I was too old. Of course she is too old too! Come on, can we get another Coke?”
“We’ll see,” Claudio says.
He gets to his feet and then turns and hauls me up, fingers wrapped around my elbows. Our eyes lock, an expression that I can’t read sitting deep within his eyes, and his hand trails down my forearm, over my wrist, over my hand, then finally lets go.
I swallow hard, feeling drunk and dizzy, all because of him.
He grabs Vanni’s hand and they walk along the edge of the crowd to the food cart, me right behind them.
Twelve
Claudio
I am nervous.
I stare at my reflection, trying to decide if I should wear a tie with my suit or not, but I can’t make up my mind. It shouldn’t matter—I have nights like this at the gallery all the time. It’s just me and my friends, and maybe one of my friends will bring someone with money who will buy one of my pieces of art and I can breathe easier.
Or maybe not.
But of course, it’s not just business as usual this time. This time, I have company.
In another world, another universe, perhaps one that even Vanni isn’t aware of, she would be a date.
But in this one, at least, she is a guest.
Grace is coming with me to gallery night.
And she’s why I’m nervous.
She’s why I can’t decide on tie or no tie.
She’s the one I want to impress.
La mia musa.
I’m starting to think she’s my muse.
Outside, thunder rumbles ominously. After nearly two weeks of sun and building heat, the tension has broken. Dark clouds gather behind the peaks of the distant hills with threats of rain. It would be good for the land to have some rain tonight. Perhaps it would be good for everyone, a reprieve of sorts.
The relationship between Grace and I has gotten more complicated over the last week. Prior to my sisters showing up, I was willingly pushing her, seeing how far I could go. I wanted to know if she felt what I felt. Something a bit more complicated than pure attraction. Yes, I lust for her but it’s more than that. It’s something inside me recognizing something in her. Perhaps the pull of an artist’s heart for an artist’s heart. Maybe it’s just the potential of what we could be.
But my sister Maria reminded me that it wasn’t just my feelings that were complicated. It was the situation. With Grace being Jana’s client, with her being here because of Jana, because she needs to finish this book, I realized how selfish and inappropriate I have been. There’s a part of me that physically aches for her, this need to be around her, to gaze at her beauty, and I can do all that without involving Grace.
I just haven’t felt this way in a long time … dare I say, ever. I’m not sure what to do with myself, and pleasuring myself night after night with thoughts of her hasn’t helped—if anything, it’s made it worse because my imagination is pretty fantastic, but it stops