around the dinner table when it instantly brings up thoughts of dick size and wild monkey sex?
“Oh,” Caylee says, easily satisfied and backing away from that verbal bear trap.
“Where’s the groom?” Connor interrupts, trying to move things along and check the boxes he’s got in his head for this visit. “I thought I was going to meet him.”
It’s the right move, redirecting the conversation to a topic he knows his sister will want to talk about so that she doesn’t focus on us. Or the pretend us, at least.
“Evan will be here any minute. I came out early to talk to Mom about last-minute wedding details, and well” —she smiles generously— “he’s pretty much done with all the wedding talk. I might be a little obsessed.” She holds her finger and thumb up an inch apart, grinning at me. “I’m sure you know how it is.”
Actually, I don’t. I’m seriously the sort of woman who’ll have my wedding on a last-minute whim if and when it’s my time, but I’ve got a role to play. “Of course. We’re taking things one day at a time, though, not on the edge of The Day like you are.” I take a cue from Connor, keeping the focus on Caylee. “You must be so excited.”
Caylee squeals happily, her feet doing a tappity-tap dance on the wood floor as she finds a new ear to bend. “I can’t wait. You have to come. You’ll get him to come, won’t you?”
Her eyes implore me, nearly begging, and I look to Connor, who clears his throat. “Tonight, Caylee. I came to dinner. I’m meeting Evan. Let’s leave it at that.”
Connor’s voice isn’t unkind, just matter-of-fact, but I see the disappointment in Caylee’s eyes. She offers a shaky smile to her brother, though. “Yeah, I’m glad you’re here. I just thought . . . maybe . . .” She trails off.
The front door opens, and a male voice calls out, “Babe? Where you at?”
Caylee immediately brightens once more and runs for the door. Through the frame, I watch as she jumps into the arms of a blond man in a suit. He spins her in a circle, her knees bent to keep her feet off the ground, as he kisses her with a loud growling smack. Obviously, it’s Evan.
“I missed you today,” he tells her sweetly like a hero from a Hallmark movie. He’s definitely got eyes just for Caylee. I can see that even through my crack.
She beams as he sets her down, and they come into the big room, Caylee excitedly tugging at his hand. “Evan, this is my brother, Connor. And his fiancée, Poppy.”
Evan moves forward instantly, an easy smile on his face and his hand outstretched to Connor. “Good to meet you. I’ve heard a lot about you, man.”
“None of it good, I’m sure,” Connor quips back, taking his hand in a firm yet polite handshake.
“Let’s eat,” Mom says, stopping that train before things can run off the rails. I get the feeling that Connor’s right. Whatever Evan’s heard, it probably wasn’t good.
We go into the dining room, which despite the size and formality of the decor, is laid out with a homey casualness that tells me that even if Connor comes from a rich family with issues, their noses aren’t so far in the air that they can’t smell their own farts.
“How was your day, Evan?” Debra asks, opening a bottle of wine. “Ready for the big day?”
“Everything’s ready,” Evan says with relief. “My boss verified that my vacation is approved, and they even threw me a surprise wedding party in the break room.” He turns to Caylee. “The gifts are in the car, and Janice wrote down the list as I opened them so we can do the thank you notes to everyone correctly.”
Caylee smiles and pats his hand. “That is so sweet of her.”
“She made the cake too, and though I didn’t tell her, I am really hoping our wedding cake is tastier.” Evan pauses dramatically, already grinning at his own joke before he tells it. “She made a fondant ‘ball and chain’ decoration. Cute idea, but in execution, it looked like dog turds made of chocolate. Kinda killed the yum factor.”
Soft laughter rings the table, at least from most of us. Connor merely snorts, his lips twitching while Robert says nothing, like he didn’t even hear the joke. But everyone seems to just let that slide as food’s passed around and plates are filled.