“Thirty years and she’s still pissed,” Tim grumbled, reaching for the TV remote, a sure sign that this uncomfortable but illuminating conversation was over.
Liv stood up and went to the back of her father’s chair and lightly put her hands on the headrest. “You might want to ask yourself, Dad, why is she still so angry after thirty years?”
CHAPTER NINETEEN
CRAIG SENT MATT an email every day, asking about the animals, the roping, offering a few cleaning tips. Matt smiled every time he read one. Damn, but he missed that kid. The house was empty without Craig and right now his life felt empty without Liv—although he was doing his damndest to move past that. He’d cared for her; she hadn’t cared for him. Not enough anyway.
He rode Beckett daily, getting the horse back into shape as quickly as possible without souring him, and the rest of the time he roped off from one of his practice horses. In the evenings, he headed into Dillon and drank too much with Pete and sometimes Wes, although Wes rarely drank more than one beer. Occasionally Etta joined them, and Matt soon realized that she did not hold a grudge. In fact, now that he was no longer seeing Liv, she was game for another round. So far, Matt had put her off. He enjoyed her company, but was not interested in what she had in mind. She was funny, though, and could hold her own with the guys, which he’d always admired in a woman.
Jed never came out with them because he was now a worn-out but proud papa of two. Matt was amazed to feel stirrings of envy, which was stupid, because he was about to go back out on the road and if there were one thing he had figured out over the past few years it was that traveling and families didn’t mix—unless the families came along.
Wes let it be known whenever the subject of injury came up that he was of the same mind as Liv when it came to numbing pain—which might have been why Matt lowered the dosage. Once, then twice, then finally gave it up altogether.
Now his knee hurt, but it didn’t swell as much as before and the brace seemed to be doing its job. He was slower than he should be, but Beckett could help him add seconds to his time and thus compensate. Would he win the championship this year? Probably not. Would he beat his smart-ass brother in front of his dad and the hometown crowd?
Oh, yeah. He would make Ryan eat his words. Focusing on time and his knee helped him not focus on the one area of his life that was totally ruining him. The relationship part.
In the long run, it might be for the best that Liv kicked him out of her life. He was now deep into the competitive zone; his days revolved around roping. Despite what he’d told Liv, he’d probably have tried to put competition above his relationship. And Liv had been afraid that she’d let him do that, at her expense.
As if.
What Liv seemed to be missing here was that she hadn’t given an inch in the relationship that she pretended they weren’t having. If anyone had bent it was him. He’d shown her he cared, in every way he knew how and it hadn’t been enough. He was tired of sleepless nights, tired of his gut being all tied up. They could have had so much more, did have so much more when Liv forgot herself and let her guard down, but now he was done. Frustrated, angry and done.
* * *
LINDA, WHO WAS horrified when she discovered that one of her team members was unmounted, lent Liv a horse. A small fine-boned bay Paso Fino named Queso, who felt like a pony after riding sturdy Beckett. No one to blame but herself. She was once again perusing the ads, looking for a big quarter horse gelding, knowing that none would be the same as Beckett.
She’d had to let him go, though. She wanted no ties to Matt. No strings. It was him wanting those things that had gotten her into trouble in the first place.
Why couldn’t they have continued as they were? When had Matt become a relationship guy?
A one-woman guy. And she could have been that woman.
She didn’t want to be anyone’s woman.
But she was also stunned at how much she hated seeing Matt with another woman—and of all people, it